NoThInG^^

2005-10-13T03:03:00.000+08:00

WAh,......im blogging...AGAIN!!...ya.... that stupid Queen FORCE ME ONE!!!....arbo no PENCIL!!.... hahahahaha

oh ok....was kinda deep in thoughts today....about things that have been happening to me lah....relationship probs (maybe nt such a prob...coz i cant be bothered i guess....or more like i dont wanna be)........erm....work...ya...and alittle of a family prob.....oh well......

Erm...this song kinda struck me lah....part of it is something i feel so ya.... and again...its kelly clarkson....WHATS HER PROB MANZZ....lolx....song so nice...hahaha....siaozz....madness....

Because of You by Kelly Clarkson

I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way, to never let it get that far

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because I know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake a smile, a laugh
Every day of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I watched you die
I heard you cry
Every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry
In the middle of the night
For the same damn thing

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I tried my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid

Because of you
Because of you

ok...ciaoz....eh QUEEN!!....SEE....I POSTED SOMETHING....!!!!!.......

2005-10-12T00:36:00.000+08:00

MIRACLE!!!!...... im blogging.....hahahah

Ya...scared they close down my blog coz i nv update.....i still one my archives....hahaha..... oh well..... ya..

QUEEN JILL!!!!!...... HI!!!!!!........................lol

Aiyah...its been ages since i last blog....so ya...here i am...just posting this single post for the sake of doing so....so ya.....

Having my school attachment now.....yup....life is pretty mono.....ya..work everyday....bowl almost everyday...ya...still no imporvement...hahahaha

Well....many things have been happening to me lately.....erm....good and bad....ya....more of bad things lah....so ya.....oh well....im alright lah....just feeling damn LOST (Watch it on channel 5 thursday nite at 10pm,.....hahahaha...) ..... as if i watch it....

Ya....well...im pretty much confused....lost....low in confidence now...... yup......my bowling is practically a gonner now...guess i wont be in the team nxt year alr....sianz....oh well.....ya....arrr....im still damn lousy...hahaha....

is there a relationship GURU out there??????...... i need some help here.... YES HERE!!!!!!

okok....ending here....ciaoz.....

2005-08-01T20:41:00.000+08:00

Fark la....whats with my luck lately....

Today....work submission....happily kena sabo by my grpmates la....say they will hand in on time....so ya....passed my part to them to hand in.....basket....all the while i was feeling uneasy lah....got a feeling they will not make it on time lah....happily....reached school at about 12.05 ..... FARK!!!...they haven submit yet lah....thks manz...late submission now my grades gonna suffer lah.....fark la....i already failed that damn paper already lah.....

Sigh~~..... fark la....farking suay lah..... everything just not going right lah....

2005-07-26T03:20:00.000+08:00

Damn suay manz...... just my luck la.....

Today, got played out by this guy from ClubHyundai.... apparently he is no hyundai driver.... a S15 driver...

As i was looking for a alarm sound module....he pm to offer me at 40 dollars... so ya...why not...a good buy right??..... guess its too good to be true manz....

Reached jurong to wait for him... ( i stay in the east)..... he out of no where...asked if i was driving a turbo car??? .... i mean...WTF...im from clubhyundai wad.....

He later on said that the sound module cannot put in normal stock alarm....i said nvm...i just but the module from him.... but he later die die don wanna sell... he said if only i buy the whole alarm system which he is selling at $925 .... think i stupid ar.....bloody cock.....

Later on, he just said.... " PLease go change your car, you are riding a stupid getz" ..... " My S15 can win you 5-6 lamp post easily"

..... After reading this.... " HOT " manz.... ... hope he dont crash manzz......

Just my luck lah....fark....

And guess what.... Mid-Sem test....i practically failed lah.... now is fail 2 paper for sure....not sure about the last paper..... sigh~~~.... whats wrong manz......

2005-07-11T04:54:00.000+08:00

Sigh~~.....cant seem to slepp...sianz....damn tired of so many things already....arr crap.....dont feel like typing already..... Wadeva la.....

2005-07-07T19:47:00.000+08:00

Seems like just yesterday
You were a part of me
I used to stand so tall
I used to be so strong
Your arms around me tight
Everything, it felt so right
Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong
Now I can't breatheNo, I can't sleep
I'm barely hanging on

Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

I told you everything
Opened up and let you inYou made me feel alright
For once in my life
Now all that's left of me
Is what I pretend to be
So together, but so broken up inside'
Cause I can't breatheNo, I can't sleep
I'm barely hangin' on

Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

Swallow me then spit me out
For hating you, I blame myself
Seeing you it kills me now
No, I don't cry on the outside
Anymore...

Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

Here I am, once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
Just thought you were the one
Broken up, deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes

2005-07-05T20:29:00.000+08:00

Day 2 of Mid-Sem.... yup....erm...today's paper wasnt that bad i suppose.....

tomorrow is the last day...ya...kinda realise that i cant take management subjects lah...sigh~~....hopefully that tomorrow's paper wouldnt be that bad also....but got a feeling it might not be easy lah...coz its management paper....sigh~~~....

Good luck to all marketing people....ciaozz

2005-07-04T20:54:00.000+08:00

Day 1 of Mid-Sem.... well....yup....screwed up my first paper.....

Sigh~~.... damn pissed manz....studied so much on the front parts....happily...everything came out on the last 2 chapts that i never put much attention to.....so ya.... 3 questions- 50 marks..... ALL 3 WRONG ANSWERS~!!!!.....sigh~~..... donno lah.... hope my overall can pass lor...

Hopefully the next 2 aint gonna be that bad manz.....

OH ya.... good luck to all Marketing People...... ciaozz

2005-07-03T04:11:00.000+08:00

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2005-07-02T04:52:00.000+08:00

CAnt sleep.....nothing better to do....ya...here's a song.....

I'll always remember

it was late afternoon

It lasted forever
And ended so soon(yeah)

You were all by yourself Staring up at a dark grey sky,

I was changed.....

In places no one will find All your feelings so deep inside (deep inside)

Was there that I realized That forever was in your eyes The moment I saw you cry (cry)
The moment that I saw you cry

It was late in September , And I've seen you before(and you were)
You were always the cold one

But I was never that sure......

You were all by yourself Staring up at a dark grey sky....

I was changed......

In places no one will find All your feelings so deep inside (deep inside)
Was there that I realized That forever was in your eyes
The moment I saw you cry....

I wanted to hold you
I wanted to make it go away
I wanted to know you
I wanted to make your everything...alright

I'll always remember,
It was late afternoon
In places no one will find

Baby, oh no no
forever was in your eyes
was there that I realized that forever was in your eyes
The moment I saw you cry Baby Cry!
The moment that I saw you cry Oh no no
I think I saw you cry
The moment I saw you cry (fade out)

I wanted to know you
I wanted to know you
I wanted to know you

Just a stupid song that bugged me the whole day while i was day dreaming in lecture.......

2005-06-30T04:00:00.000+08:00

Sigh~~~...... blank........ya....im just staring at this freaking com like nobodies business.....sigh~~~.....

Really donno what to post lah...ya....aint feeling too good....as usual...like i need to say like that.....k ciaozz...

2005-06-28T02:10:00.000+08:00

Staring infront of the computer for the past few hours.....sigh~~...also donno what the hell is wrong lah....i still cant sleep....i need to sleep....people are calling me panda now...again..ya....

I still got some medical check up thing tomorrow morning at sports council lah....sianz.....

Next week is Mid-sem already....but im so not in the mood the study lah...aiyah...as usual lah....

Shit la....suddenly gone blank again....donno what to write already....sigh~~~

k ....ciaozz

2005-06-26T04:46:00.000+08:00

Sigh~~~............ i cant seem to sleep.....why why why........arrgghhh~~~~~~~~~~~

I am still feeling very much lost....i donno why....its like now....i want to see her...but i dont dare to....because it aint gonna do me any good...ya....if only im a good talker...ya....sweet talker.....so that i could change the way she think ??.... that fellow has the ability....and i dont....sigh~~~~

If only i could.....if only she will realise all of how i feel..... if only i could realise how she feel..... sigh~~~..... If only~~~~~~~

2005-06-25T19:11:00.000+08:00

Sigh~~....finals ended yesterday.....sigh~~.....bowled badly lah...ya...was expecting more from myself after the first few games....i was so close to winning something..but yet....sigh~~..nvm....anyway i did quite alrite for a first time lah....so ya....don think abt it liao...its a good experience lor......

Sigh~~~.....haven been feeling any better these few days.....today am home alone the whole day....really feeling very lost now....ya....i also have no idea whats going on with me....i actually kept day dreaming about hoping for life to be better and all...ya....whats wrong with me....

I tried finishing spiderman just now....skipped alot of part....watched the end....and as usual it got me into ( no-link) relating about things between me and her.....its like im waiting till the day she realise me.... ya...like how mary jane realise the truth abt spiderman and the reasons....ya.... ok...i know im talking rubbish all over again....

NOw i only can really just tell myself to face the facts lah....i mean....since talking to her aint gonna make a difference in the way she thinks about things on me...its not gonna change her perspective on things.....i guess....nothing else could help already.....proabably time??....or someone to kok her head....i donno.....sigh~~....im feeling damn shit now lah.... and this time...i do not know who i could talk to....i just hopw i don go crazy lah....aiyha...i wont....i think....i wont act stupid......sigh~~~~

I just dont understand why does things have to end up like this......i mean...why isit that other people always get the happy ending.....but i always seem to get all the bad endings.....what i wished for or dreamed off....always turn out the opposite way in realiaty....ya...worst......much worst......sigh~~~.....

But there isnt anything that i could so about it......why......sigh~~~~

I also dont have to act like im fine.....because she will know whether i am or not.....ya....other people wouldnt be able to know that lah....but ya...she will...somehow....so ya.... sigh~~~.....

I really donno lah.....feeling like fuck now.....stopping here for now....... ciaozz

2005-06-23T22:05:00.000+08:00

Sigh~~~......sianz....feeling damn fuck up now....i donno why....

Everything seems to be haunting me all over again....and ya....finals is tomorrow....well done!!....

I donno why lah....but im seriously feeling damn lousy now....ya....like fuck~~.....this sucks lah..... so many things that i just wouldnt understand....i just dont get it....i dont.....what the fuck is wrong lah....

Why does all this even have to happen??....whats the meaning behind all this.....i donno lah....im also confused about certain stuff now.....whats true and whats not.....ya again...what makes me so lousy that i cant win an asshole ??.... am i really that lousy ?....FUCK ~~~~.......WTF...why am i even thinking about all this.....sigh~~~....

k lah....seriously dont feel like doing anything now....k...ciaozz

2005-06-23T18:06:00.000+08:00

Sigh~~~.... just got home...ya....and i know its kinda early to blog at this hour...but ya...who cares....i aint feeling too good...oh well...as usual lah....just with some added fever into it....fun right ?.....

Kinda realise one thing..... why great story tellers such as tolkiens, rowlings, crichton..(spelling error la)...etc. are earning the big bucks and being so famous in the world.....well....answer is simple... They can fake the story to a point where the whole world will believe in them and get mesmerize in them??.....or even think they are god....Pui~~~..... oh well...these people may be really great lah.... but .... My advice to my dear friends out there....

If you got a friend who is also a great story teller......be very very careful of this kinda people.....they can screw you up you know.....so ya...be careful alright..... well....i have one that is stepping on my tail now.....he dont let me kena until i cannot tahan....i sure make him jialat jialat.....FUCK~~.....you lai lah...i sacred you ar....

Well....at least...i have other people around me that have seen through him....and apparently i seem to be seeing even more of this kinda friends recently....(Told you to be careful of him already)....(fuck care him lah)...ya...stuff like that......so i suppose im not the one who kena from it lah.....well well....at least these friends are old enough to tell me what is right and wrong....and i beleive i am old enough to see what is and whats not..... apparently my parents are also one of those that agrees to that...so ya......

All i can say i was dumb to not see that fellow clearly lah.....hmm....what can i describe him....erm.....aiyha...no point...dont wanna waste my time.....he likes to be that way....thats his life....let him be....we have no say.....right ??.....yup.....

Sigh~~.... donno lah....tomorrow is finals.....well...just have to see how it goes lor.....hope i could sleep early tonight??...erm.......not possible lah ar......haha....well.....guess i will just try day dreaming abit lah....haven been able to day dream for quite sometime.....hopefully something good ??....i hope.....

We'll shall see......k lah....donno what to write already...aint feeling too good...ya...emotionally unsound now...k...

Ciaozz

2005-06-22T04:03:00.000+08:00

Sigh~~~~ Just got home....ya....11pm squad started later than last night....ended my squad at 2plus am.... so ya...here i am....

Was practically stoning at the alley for more than 2 hours before my squad starts.......all i can say is that the 2 hours plus felt like forever lah....ya...i reached there....first thing i see....ya....two of them....i was like....WTF!!....just my luck....or should i say....expected...ya...stupid me...its expected.....

Tomorrow still got journal....and suppose to meet groupmates at 11am....sigh~~..... cant seem to sleep....

Somehow my parents kinda knew what happened.....i was like....WTF!!....donno which idiot go and tell them lah....so they are trying to tell me some life principles and all lah....i was like....Fuck la...so you all still trying to tell me that piece of shit is how nice and all lah....eh... my ass!!!..... he aint such a simple person he seem to be lah...... ( this point, im not the only one that agrees to it).....yesh....some other people do agree with me on that....and i wasnt the one who said that first.....

Aiyah....dono what to say lah....say too much also no point.....ppl will still die die side him one lah.....so ya....don bother wasting my time.... k..... ciaozz

2005-06-21T03:03:00.000+08:00

Sigh~~~......just got back from my last squad for the nite....ened at 1plus am....tired like shit lah...

Guess its just my luck lah....still dont think its enough lah.....always one stupid game that kill me lah....sigh~~....

Don't think if im gonna bowl tmr alr....still got test...and im damn tired already....sigh~~...donno manz.....

Ya...anyway....aiyha...donno lah....k..... ciaozz

2005-06-20T00:39:00.000+08:00

Sigh~~~........... still not enough to qualify......left one squad..... ive used up all my sponsored MQs already....how manz???....

This sucks........

Kinda find that im seriously damn weak and ya...shit too........ why do i get affected by people around that easily....why cant i just get on over with my life.....

I actually have people saying that i am in the wrong....no doubt i am....but hello!!....im not totally lah...fark......even if i am....dont compare me with some people who pop out of no where please.....WTF!!!.....so now you trying to say...whatever it is....the fellow is the good guy who is innocnet and all that shit.... eh... PUI~~~~...... dont disgust me lah..... FUCK!~!~~~!~!~~

For CDL,

Everyone is scoring so damn high lah....sigh~~....really sianzz 1/2

DOnno lah.....gonna try tomorrow again.....just have to pray for the best lah~~..... ciaozz.....

2005-06-18T23:35:00.000+08:00

Oh no!!!..... how the hell am i suppose to qualify manz....sigh~~~.... so many things....

Tried 3 MQ today....sigh~~....3rd one was practically wasted....shouldnt have bowled.....sigh~~....so rush...plus...my left...is that fellow (ya..ppl pro leh...bowl perfect game)...not like me...lousy shit.......ok nvm....my right ( abt 3 lanes away)....samantha and her guy.... Wahahaha.... well done!!!..... .

Donno manz....tmr gonna try again...so high scoring.... how am i gonna make it??....can i??.....

Sigh~~... tomorrow tomorrow..... hahahahahaha...... ciaozzzz

2005-06-16T23:26:00.000+08:00

Fuck'!!!........ sigh~~....tell me about feeling lucky lah......

Today.....ok la...dont talk about school stuff....not that big of an issue.....

Went training today.....ya...making changes to my game.....donno why also...at this time??...sigh~~...i donno manz..... then happily kena lecture by coach today....sigh~~...what i do again.....but ya....afterall i suppose its a good thing la....hope it helps...ya...positively rather than negative.....

And ya....2 days before CDL.... my back is now hurting like fark lah......ya....injured my back lah....whats wrong manz.....everything just aint going right.....

Just now after training....."ke kiang".... chinese =" fake clever".......if i just go home from tranining...and dont go over to victors to watch the collegiate league.....ya...i wouldnt see them.....but ya....like how the fark i know she would be there to watch him bowl ar.....how i know they got so damn close......sigh~~... but ya....didnt know she was there want....until when i was looking around ....and ya.....5 mintues later....i buay tahan la...so ya....zao already lor.....sigh~~~......

Just cant seem to get myself to face it lah.....WTF!!!!......i guess i rather avoid from it.....no other choice....sigh~~~...... i really wonder when can i just start blogging about happy stuff lah......or wait....did anything happy even happened to me lately??....apparently not.....not in quite sometime i would say....not this year....not something that got me really happy.....i guess 2005 aint such a good year lah......sianzz.....

2005-06-13T03:03:00.000+08:00

Sigh~~~........ another week gone just like that....... sianz....

Cant seem to sleep.....ya....and well....cant seem to not think about things that have been happened between me and her lah.....sigh~~~.....i guess its just my fate lah....i dont really have a choice....

Next week is CDL....i really dont think my bowling is in shape.....im left with 5 days to get it in shape....i hope i will be alright....

Next week..... i really donno will i still get affected by the 2 of them once again???....i cant just let some guy to screw me up just like that right ??....yup....i must be strong manz....i will...... ( i think) ..... as for seeing sam and jeff....i guess feeling weird is normal....and it shouldnt be that bad already lah....i think....ya.....

Having so many doubts......but my main concern seem to be more and her and him....rather than sam and jeff..... think of it...i damn suay ar.... always ended up as the extra party.....well done!!!.....

This sucks manz.... why should i let these people affect me.....sigh~~~.....so useless.....im weak manz......

well....just my luck i guess...... sigh~~~~~......anyway.... good morning.....

2005-06-12T02:40:00.000+08:00

Was just wondering....was i affected by her during the whole of youth challenge??? .....i really donno leh....coz during each game...i cant help but to turn my head over to look at her at times???....so ya.... am i considered affected.....

When seeing them both talking and all....it kinda makes me damn sianz.......or shld i say....dulan!!!..... donno lah!!!......

2005-06-11T00:20:00.000+08:00

Was damn bored.....after washing car....back to stoning infront of the computer lah....

Was browsing through friends blog....yup....Nick has finally found his girl..... ya....feel happy for him lah....like at last !!!....

Erm....actually besides that i also donno what to say lah....so ya....its coz nick's gf also someone who was there for him for the past 3 year??...so ya...im a little sensitive to this kinda stuff lah....so erm...ya...kinda reminded me of her....sigh~~... nvm lah....shall not talk about it already......

Still kinda disappointed about my bowling lah...sigh~~.......

k lah...not gonna write much today....maybe tmr i shall write an essay ??...haha....siao~~~....

2005-06-09T23:33:00.000+08:00

yup....end of youth challenge for me..... sianz.... didnt manage to make a fight back.... was so close to it la....but ya....last 2 games killed me...totally....sigh~~~...... can i blame on other stuff?? .....ok...first thing that i wanna blame would be.... if only i could have got my ball drilled earlier....bcoz ya....wed i went down to remy's place to drill ball....and the ball worked well for the lanes today.....sigh~~.... suay lor....couldnt get the ball drilled earlier on.....remy didnt have the time....so ya.... bo bianzz...... not enough equipment i guess.....

Ya.... i would not be blaming the 2 of them la......coz ya....no point also....if i want to bowl....i will have to see them....thats the case....no choice....unless i quit bowling lor.....SIAO!!....hmmm....but ya....maybe.....its not that siao afterall....

I'm seriously damn pissed off with myself already....after so long...i cant even qualify a tournment....what the hell lah.....sigh~~......okok....shall not give up....hopefully i wont....ya....still got CDL next week....or should i say the week after....ya.....dont think im gonna take a break for the whole week....will go for some training before CDL..... dont really dare to put much hopes lah....but do have that confidence that i will be able to do better....i will.....not gonnna feel lousy already....must beleive in myself lah.....ya.... i will be fine after a few days i think....

I guess this is just another set back.....just not sure how many i have to go through....and will i be able to take it...but ya....thats another issue already...for now......just go and bowl my best lor......

Look on the bright side.....ive nv got so close to qualifying lah....so i guess its a good...erm.... breakthrough i suppose???....ya....an improvment in someway lah.....so ya.....just work hard while i can....left a few more months to be in the team already...so ya...must buck up...... i cant let people to keep looking down on me manz.....this cant go on.....yup yup....

Sigh~~...back to my life....ya la...i know i haven been blogging much.....but guess im just so damn bloody bored to stare at the computer for hours not doing a thing...ya......

Oh....i haven been online for almost a month ??....as in MSN...wow.....i think ar....i might as well delete my MSN la....haha.....

Kinda realise that ive been back to square one in life lah.....i mean....most of the time i seem to be alone in my own world...haha.....after school.....makan with friends that bye!!....after bowling.....bye!!... ya....always seem to be alone now.....sigh~~~....but ya....what to do...thats life lah....face it.....

Think of it....its kinda sad that things between me and her turned out like this.....i mean....i guess i was harsh on my words back then.....but.... ya....nvm lah....no point talking about it already....over liao.....just have to face it..... just that i felt....she kinda went over-board a little bit by saying those stuff la......ya...was pretty pissed off by that la....sigh~~~.....just donno why i cant even be able to spend time with her when shes about to leave lah....sigh~~~.....aiyah.....donno lah.....sianzz................

Sometimes ar.....tell u guys honestly la.....i actually felt like taking my bowling ball and smash it at that fellow lah....ya....sounds like anger and all right??....hahahaha.....i also donno la....but ya...thats what i felt at times lah....really just wanna throw it at him la....haha.....

Just felt that lately.....many things have been happening to me lah.....also donno why....some are family problems lah....okok....not much of that serious matter la.....but ya....and life seem to be changing alot for me....i donno.......at times....suddenly feeling that....someone important left you???....ya...something like that....sigh~~~......

OH ya....shit manzz..... this CDL sure gonna be a emotional test for me..... gonna face 2 pairs that i do not wanna see....ya....sam and jeffery ( though its so long....but ya...feel abit weird lor) ....and ya...second would be the 2 of them lor..... sigh~~~~........i hope i will be ok lah......yup.....hopefully..... or the most....if i see them there...i zao first...later then come back lor..... hahahaha....siao~~......

2005-06-08T19:28:00.000+08:00

Well well.... I did a Wonderful thing.....yaya.....damn Pro at it also....

You see.....after first day of Youth Challenge..... im overall 4th....ya...not bad right..... up 50 pins....means 208avg .....

guess what........second day....i can bowl a under 248 .... which is a 15+ avg..... well done!!!!

Sigh~~.....i've got nothing to say liao.....think im gonna fall sick soon....sianzz....

2005-05-30T23:26:00.000+08:00

Sigh~~~........ Ya...when i blog....means i aint feeling too good.....

Kinda realise something.....a cannot make it person....no matter what you do....still cannot make it one...ya....im that kinda person..... Trained so hard....happily...just seeing 2 person...could spoil everything???....or am i coming out with an excuse for my poor performance.....aaargghhhh...wadeva la....

I realise that ya....loving somebody....means having to let it go....so ya....ive learnt it the hard way....for now....all i can do is give them my blessings......

Haven been on MSN for almost 2 weeks.....actually....its coz i didnt dare to go online....ya....im avoiding seeing her....its not like i want to....but i really cant get myself to take it as if that nothing had happened....so thats the only thing i can do......

It sucks when u see them 2 happily having a good time together....and me feeling like crap when i see that....FARK IT La.....why should i let other people screw my life.....ive had enough of all this shit....

AARRRrrrrGGGhhhhhhhhhhh...............................

I seriously thing that....im really a pretty useless person la.......fuck it manz.....

2005-05-17T00:38:00.000+08:00

Alright.... Things have finally kinda came to an end....ya...at last....

I am seriously very sick and tired of all that had happened already..... just glad that the friendship is saved....ya...hopefully.....

Guess i cant really write out anymore about my feelings on this matter already....it would just cause problems to arise again....i really have to swollow it already.....dont really have a choice.... i just want to let this matter rest for good....

Cant help but to think of all the negative stuff about myself.....but ya....i think i will be alright when time passes....so ya....i'll be fine.....life still goes on..... i just have to learn to face things...be it good or bad....fair or unfair....so ya.....nvm la......

Really hate the way im feeling now....haven felt this bad before....but....everyone just have to go through this stage somehow.... at this point....how i wished somebody could lend me a shoulder....kinda need one badly now....ya... and i just cant help but to feel useless.....

if only someone could understand how i am feeling now.......does anybody even know ???...... im really controlling myself not to breakdown on this anymore....but why do i feel that i am on the verge of breaking down now.........i really cant take it anymore.....i cant.......I REALLY CANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I dont know why....but at this point....i cant seem to find someone that i could talk to....really....i cant....nobody seem to be able to be there for me when i need someone that badly.....im really feeling very bad now......does anyone even bother ??......

To tell you honestly....i really do not one her to see this....because im worried she will get pissed with me and all again.....which i really dont want it to happen anymore.......

Hey girl.....appreciate that last chance you give me....will cherish it......i will.....

ok guys....shall stop here.....feeling damn weak ....again....sigh~~~~...k.....

2005-05-16T01:00:00.000+08:00

............ i hope you will take the effort to read this post.......

I did not ever wanted you to feel like this......really..... now you asked me to leave you alone.....i also donno how to say things to you.....just hope you will bother to read my blog.....

You asked me not to blame the guy and all.....you tell me it isnt protecting and all....but PLEASE!!!!....can you read back carefully .....SINCE when did i write anything to bitch about anyone ???....did i fuck him in any way.,...NO!!.....i barely even wrote about him!!!!!!!!!!!!....and you are telling me not to put the blame on him......how you expect me to feel................

You said i do not care about how you are feeling.....please....i do not say it out....that doesnt mean i am not considering about how you are feeling ok.....i do know about how you are feeling on some other stuff that could be bothering you..... just that...i felt u never took this situation seriously....

All the while....i've been thinking....worrying about your nationals....just that i dont say....im just giving you the support in me.....before all of these ever happened....i always tell you ...you can make it one....i still mean it....i have confidence in you.....i know you are stressed up about it....who said im not....just that i dont say...doesnt mean anything.....i mean...so what if i say....right ????.....especially at this point of time.....how you expect me to say.....I worried about your nationals for you too.....the fact that you have lost weight....means ur game is going to be affected.....i told you that.....

You are leaving.....and what the hell makes you think that i am not sad about it at all ???......huh?....i am so damn worried when you leave.....how can i even talk to you.....you said i don care.....then why the hell do i even want to plan to fly there alone just to meet you ??.... knowing the fact that my parents wont allow.....but i still want to find a way..... I am also worried about you having to start a new life there.....not knowing if you could get used to it anot..... ya ....u might say u never asked me to fly over...ya....but its all because i care about you.....i want to see that you are alright.....is that wrong ?????

You are feeling sick lately......i am also worried....but i have also been sick lately....but who is there for me to tell.....

So many things that i am worried for you.......I JUST DIDNT HAD THE CHANCE TO TELL YOU ALL OF THISSSSS.....!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..........do you even understand.,......

You said all i thought was to convince you to give me a chance.....YES I KNOW.....i want it so badly to get a chance from you......BUT YA...FINE......I know already..... I will STOP ALL MY NONSENSE K????........ All i want know is you to be alright........really......i repeated all the thing....was that i felt you did not take it into consideration seriously....coz afteralll..... you are already having feelings for that fellow....than how you want me to react??.....walk away and keep quiet isit and hide everything from you ??? ???.....you know i dont hide things from you....i tell you everything what....even my feelings i also tell them to you......

The point where i found out that you lied to me about not being at his place.....do you know how fuck up i am feeling ??..... you said i you don wan me to think.,.....but have u considered that since u knw im thinking abt it already...why cant you just tell me the truth.....

You said i didnt cared about your feelings.............then can i just ask a question ??? ............. then who the hell even care about how i feel ????......i dont have anyone that i can tell everything.....i do have my other problems that only you knew.....how i wished i could share all of them to you......but before i could.....all this stuff happened!!!.....how you expect me to react.....

Every night.....i couldnt sleep.......i know im a guy and all....but fuck it....i do tear at night alright.....

It really hurts me when you said that i do not care about you at all.......but the fact is i still do care about you.....how i wished i could be there to share all the problems that you are facing..... Other people may not bother about how you are feeling....but i definetly do bother about how you feel......i really do..... when i said you are important to me.....i dont just say it you know.....i meant it......

..... ... Many times....i have wanted to talk to you normally.....but you were the one who didnt wanted to talk to me.....i have wanted so much to share the problems that im facing....and hopefully you will share your problems with me too.....but you didnt gave me the chance to talk to you......you didnt..........

Now that you asked me to leave you alone......

Just want you to know that.....when you are feeling better...... I WILL STILL BE HERE to LISTEN TO EVERYTHING THAT YOU've got to say.....and i hope you will allow me to be there for you.....thats all im asking.......

2005-05-15T21:31:00.000+08:00

I'm just a useless piece of shit............. cant even win to someone who you just knew.......

2005-05-15T01:23:00.000+08:00

AArrrrgggghhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

F***!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What is wrong with me ????........ Everyday i try to tell myself not to think about it about....try to act like im really alrite.....but why is that always.....it just comes back to haunt me....out of no where....i just cant help but to get affected by it.....why ....

Feeling that they are happily having a great time talking to one another or whatever lah.........here i am...feeling like fuck....what the hell is wrong with me lah.....

Arrrggghhhhh!!!!!!!

2005-05-13T23:44:00.000+08:00

Realised that knowing that it has always been a one-sided thing..... but why do i keep thinking that there would be a chance ???.....guess im really hoping too much and expecting too much....

Wasnt able to understand.....why things couldnt work out....apparently i have one answer now.... "its just im not good enough for her ???" .....i guess so....

There are things she dont like.....ive changed....she doesnt take that....and others......i will change....its not like a very big problem....thats the way i think.....

Now.....i really just have to face it.....but if only i can dont face it at all....how i wish i could totally avoid it.....

Friends tell me to look for someone important or should i say close... to talk about my problems.....but in this case.....the only person that i really take it as the most important person to me.....is the one that im having a problem with.....den how ??.....sigh~~~~

Think of it.....so what if she is that important.....and so what if she knows??.....does it even help ??....no.....but at least for me....looking at the bright side....im glad she knew how important she is to me.....sigh~~~~....ya....i meant " is" ...meaning she still will be.....always will be.....

So....if anybody wanna talk bad about her infront of me..... i will make sure i will talk bad infront of you about you!!....anyway...the whole thing has all the while been a problem with me...and not her......so ya.....i was the naive one....to think....it would be a happy ending.....

2005-05-13T01:54:00.000+08:00

Just had panadol....apparently its the 3rd night ive been eating it....every nite feeling sick...like got fever ...last night had fever....so ya....just now during training wasnt feeling that good either....

Was about to eat my panadol with 7-up....my brother kinda scolded me....ask me if i wanna die isit ?...so ya....

This kinda reminded me of something...ya...of course its her lah....thats like how dumb i can be lah....

Remeber there was once..think abt 1 and 1/2 years ago...i was super sick....infact....bedridden....i could barely walk properly at all...ya...but i wanted to pass her the birthday present i got for her....i remember i had to give it to her earlier....coz she gonna leave for holidays during her bdae period that yr...wanting to give her....so badly....ya....i crawled out of bed....somehow....i manage to get myself to the alley...while half dead.....passed her the present....ya...

Was feeling damn weak....when to buy panadol outside the mama store....and ya....without knowing....i ate panadol with 100plus....thought i could feel better and go back to the alley to talk to her.......but after that......in a while.....was just feeling like shit...ya...like gonna die....infact...from what i know....it could have been fatal...ya....or else my brother wouldnt have scolded me...he was a medic...so ya..... i was like couging my lungs and all other organs out....and ya...i was wearing i think 3 - 4 layers of clothes....ya....it felt like...i wanted to just rest or sleep...ya...haha...am i crapping ??...i donno....i only know...that feeling sucks manz....really.... people pass by me were just staring at me lah....like is this fellow ok ?...ya...it felt stupid though....but ya....

By the way....i am seriously not exaggerating about it.....so ya......just felt so bored that...i just wanna blog something....well....i guess....im kinda shocked by how dumb i can be lah.....so ya....stupid me......

2005-05-11T09:32:00.000+08:00

HAd a terrible headache last night....and now im up...less than 4 hours of slp?....

Ya...i am officially rejected once again and yes....its the same girl.....but i have no idea...why it hurts so damn much .... and why is it that....i cant even win a person you knew for 2 freaking weeks???.....its been 3 years.....

I seriously think that...all this was because i screwed myself so much....that i didnt realise....for so long....somethings i dont get it at all.... i regret doing all that back then.....but what done is done....i just have to face the mess i created....

I always seem to be liking the wrong person.....all the time....you're the one that i put in everything i could....perhaps....i shouldnt go and like anyone at all....then probabaly i will not get hurt again....this feeling seriously sucks....

I dont know why i even cry for this lah.....wanna laugh at me...go ahead....but im just dat weak.....

I really cant help but to hate myself for screwing things up...... But doesnt a person really change.....by saying a person change...is that really an excuse ??....

At this point i dont even feel like doing anything at all....seriously....

HOnestly....kinda regret coming into bowling....realise that bowling had only caused me more pain....i donno why....but really....getting tired of bowling already....i donno lah....fuck manz.......

Shes gonna leave in 3 months time....to US....ya....u guys know what.....i was so naive to think that we could even be in a long term relationship....long distance to be exact......but well....i guess...that could only happen in my wildest dreams.........

Putting effort ....or should i say....putting whatever i have...into it.....will not turn out good at all.....coz it has always been a one sided thing.....

NOw....ive got so many things in my mind.....

I really hope......i do not explode....at times i feel like....ya....i think im gonna be under some depression already....could someone really please help me ???? ........i really feel like exploding right now....if only i could feel nothing at all.....really....i donno why....but im feeling so much pain....so dam much pain.....if only somebody could just pick me up from this mess.....

I hate myself ......so damn much.....

2005-05-10T22:56:00.000+08:00

Kinda realise that i only blog when im down ???

As usual...im feeling like shit now...ya... DAMN FUCKING LIKE SHIT!!!..... I thought i was paranoid to think so much and all.....

But i just found out that what i felt was right ??.....then at the first place....why cant i be told the truth??...isit that difficult ????.....or am i asking too much again.....

Can someone just give me one tight slap in the face NOW!!!.....and please.....if anyone can.....i really need a shoulder badly....yes...that badly....PLEASE...but ....is there anyone that can help me???....i wished i could just help myself....

I donno lah...if this post is gonna screw myself up...then let it be....i really donno what to say already....i think im just really gettting paranoid....FUCK!!!!

There are so many things that i really want to say....but some i just donno how to put them in words....but again....by saying it out...will it help??....i can say the answer is NO!!....and worst...it will only make it worse....yes i know.,..im like indirectly saying it already....but sorry....besides here i really donno where else to say....i just hope i could just burst out lah.....freak....this sucks....had this feeling lah.....aARRGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

I really really....just hate pretending im alrite.....in actual fact....i am so damn not alright lah....fark manz....this seriously sucks.....

Why i have to pretend im alrite??....this is because i really really just want things to be normal.....but again....the problem is really lying on myself.....i donno lah....i just felt that for a moment....i cant take it anymore???.....i know maybe i will regret typing this post tomorrow morning....but fark....storing it inside myself will only make things worst for me.....

CAn somebody just help me and tell me what the hell is wrong with me???.....PLEASE!!!!!!!!.............

Sometimes its really not that i want to think too much or what....its just that bits n pieces of what i felt or see seem to just come together....can i be blamed for that ???.....

i know that im just so gonna screw myself up this time......and i have no idea why the hell am i typing....

But there is really so many things that i really hope i could just let her know.....i know i have repeated this for like so many million times lah......but why isit always this UNFAIR!!!.....i wish i could just tell her how much she means to me lah....i really wish i could.....but....will that even help at the first place....i can tell u....the answer...NO!!.....

At this point .....i really wished i could just delete the whole damn thing that i jsut typed.....really....i wished i can....but ..... a part of me just want her to read this post....hopefully she wont get pissed with me or what....i guess im again....dreaming so much that i wish things could turn out like the way u see it in the movies.....ya....i know it will never happen....maybe to other girls...it might....but for her...i can tell you for sure...its impossible.....

There is something that i really want to tell her...... " I really dont want us to be just friends....." ...... i know im so gonna regret saying this.....

I think i'll be just repeating myself over and over again......

Hope you have finished reading this post..... i just want to say... " I'm Sorry" .....if i offended you in anyway.....i really am....very very sorry....

2005-05-10T05:20:00.000+08:00

What the hell is wrong with me ????..... i woke up at 5.00am ?????!!!!!!!!!!!!.........slept for less than 2 hours only lah.... sigh~~~~~~

2005-05-09T23:22:00.000+08:00

Well....just showered lah....ya...was taking a nap just now....since i got nothing to do....sigh~~~

Today wasnt such a good day either....sianzz.....morning when down to this car accessories shop to do some stuff and also check my lock....and in the end....the trip cost me a total of 80 dollars.....when i was expecting to pay only around 50?? ....aiyha....nvm la...nt say very big amount....just felt kena " Toked" ...that pissed me off....sianz.....

Last night....apparently i did not sleep till like....7am in the morning ???....ya....im just crazy lah....haha....and i woke up at like...erm... 10am ??...or 9.30am??....i forgot...hahah....

Sometimes just have to accept the way things are happening to me....yup...coz if its meant to be....theres nothing we could do about it i suppose???.....yup...haha....damn...i sound like im damn understanding....Crap!!....lol

Aiyah....got nothing to write alr lah....think i shall just stop here..... Hopefully i could sleep early bah..... say by 4am ??....hahaha

StuPid Girl!!!.....i'm damn bored leh!!!..... *hint hint*....hehehe

2005-05-09T03:30:00.000+08:00

ITs like 3.30am in the morning right now.....and i seriously cant seem to go to bed....sigh~~~~ ...hey you!!!...yes you!!!.... YOU know im gonna blog la hoh??....hahha....bleahz

as usual lah.....i'm actually thinking about so many things lah... that stupid girl is happily SNORING!!!!.....in dreamland......hahaha....

Right now.....there are so many " If only " in my mind lah.....ya....if only i could this....if only i could that.....if only things could be like this.....if only things would turn out that way.....yaya.....so many IFs.....sianzzzz....its like....there are consequences that i have to face...if i were to do certain things that are in my "if only" list....ya...they are some that i couldnt or....should i say...dare not face lah....so ya....

I think im really in a mess right now!!!......thinking too much once again....or maybe coz its at night???......do i need a doc for this ????...... * ya...stupid girl is suppose to be that fake doc*..... hahahaha....right ?????....or at least she claimed to be lah....

Sometimes i really wonder.....does everything really happen for a reason???.....then why isit that i have people telling me that....many things doesnt need a reason behind when it happens....ya..true lah....butstill....sigh~~...wat am i talking about.....damn!!!..... But again....if theres a WHY to a question...then there is no ending to that question....more whys will come out right ??? ...... THEN!!...why the hell am i still thinking of all the whys when i know it will not end.....okok see...... another why...... sigh~~~~

Remember the book that i was suppose to be reading " Don't sweat the small stuff" .....apparently i haven finish reading it.....coz i think its suppose to be read slowly to realise diff aspects to it.....hope the book would actually help me in someway ....

I'm actually staring at this post....thinking of how to write it....ya....and its like....i haven write much also...but feels like ive got so many things to say....sigh~~~.....something is seriously wrong with me lah....but who can help me ???.....aarrrgghhh~~~~~.......

wth....its like 4.30am already....piangz.....sigh~~~....should i go n try to sleep??...still got work tomorrow....sigh~~~

Sigh~~....why does things have to turn out negative when u wish so much that it would be a happy ending??....this is so unfair lah.....sigh~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I think i really need to find something to occupy myself with....BUT WHAT!!!....if i could...wouldnt i have already done it ??....DAMN it lah....do i always have to getover things 10 times harder than others....wtf....sigh~~~

Guess i shall stop here lah......sobxsobx

2005-05-07T23:11:00.000+08:00

Had training this morning.....bowled like a cow lah!!.....well...as usual...my bowling is still in a mess.....fingers injured....whatever la....coaches making major changes to my game now...so ya....

Sigh~~~.......donno what the hell is wrong with me lah....but ya...have been feeling kinda moody the whole day lah....WTF is wrong with me lah...............arrgghhh!!!!!!

After reaching home.....Donno why...but ya....kinda feeling a rised in expenses in the family this few months??.....sigh~~~.....but what to do.....if only i could help....but at least...i aint taking any allowance from them for 2mths??.....hopefully longer lah....yup....reason why??....i cant really say it out lah....so ya....pissed off!! manz...... what a day.......!!!!!!!

Been thinking lately.....why some people can just let go of things that easily ???........i really really wish i could know how to really let go of things lah.....this sucks.......STupiD GIrl!!!.....help!!!!!!!!....sigh~~~~

I realised my imagination can really run wild manz ( Ya...i mean the negative wildness to it).......well....isit due to all these past disappointments that caused it ???.....sigh~~~..... well...apparently....i seem to be having negative outcome most of the time lah....cant help it also....

ok lah....guess im just having a down day....i'll be alrite tommorow....i think....yup....

Don feel like typing already lah....k....stopping here....

2005-05-07T01:33:00.000+08:00

Hi all....

Had a long day today.....woke up at about 9.45am....left the chalet with roger.... ( ya...i went to a friend's chalet)....erm....the chalet was rather boring la....haha...ooppzz..... but at least....got to meet that stupid girl....hehe....lalala...hahaha.....SIAO!!!....

Erm...after that...when home to get some stuff....then head down to STBC office to submit my WARNING LETTER!!!....and collect the new t-shirts....so ya....wanted to have breakfast with roger...but in the end...got to rush down to pick my uncle...so ya....when down to work lor............

Left office at about 3pm to go for training....got to make sure im early lah...so ya.....today was raning like mad lah....hahaa.....when reached OCC....luckily the rain stopped early....coz when i got there...there was this tree that fell...due to the heavy rain....then heard that 2 car got smashed lah....wah lao.....i was like...erm...ok...later on...i quickly go park downstairs at the sheltered car park..... hahaha...

Sigh~!~~~.....damn sianz about my car lah....NEW PROBLEM AGAIN!!!....now its the lock....sigh~~...but nvm la....its more of a small matter la....must be the previous owner change the alarm to a lousier one ???...nvm nvm....small matter....gonna have if settled later on bah....maybe next month....yup yup....must really train to not be bothered by this kinda matter....afterall...they aint that BIG of an ISSUE lah...so ya...what for make myself suffer....HOH stupid girl???....hahahaha....ooooppzzz....okok.....don care lah.....

After training....when down to pick roger to go Holland V to meet the others to makan....so ya....DAMN...Holland V is a place... I CONDEmnded liao....freaking jam like mad lah....crap.....

We ended up eating at adam road that hawker center....haha....erm....after that headed down to sixth avenue for some gelato ice-cream....haha....yup.....

SO here i am...........tomorrow morning...or rather later.... got training at 10am lah....haha...hopefully i can sleep early bah.....

My thumb and finger...freaking swollen and blistered liaozzz......hahaha

OK...shall stop here....

2005-05-04T01:44:00.000+08:00

Tuesday Blues!!!.....lol

Sigh~~~....super sianz....had training just now....ya...thumb abit swollen liao.....and my game aint improving...nvm nvm...slowly.....having training on thurs, friday and saturday....hahaha....so it makes up to 4 days a week....cool!!!.....SIaO!!!.......

Donno why leh....have been feeling moody lately....donno whats wrong with me also....sigh`~~~~~

Annizell is coming back tmr i think.....ya....

Shit!!.......i suddenly donno what to write already....sigh~~~.....sianzz.....k la k la....will blog again then.....

2005-05-03T01:50:00.000+08:00

im back....ya....

erm....went out in the evening to meet roger and stupid girl....haha....ya....abit weird....but nvm...

Sigh~~~....after so damn bloody long....at last i've got to meet her manz....its been ages seens i last met her....haha...ok ok...abit exageratting la....but ya....who cares....u get my point....

Erm.....sigh~~~....donno how to say la....but.....erm.......what the hell am i talking about....okok...nvm nvm.....if i know how to say...then i'll blog about it again....or...maybe not...hahaha.....okok...just talking rubbish....nvm...don bother about me manz......

ok la....dont have much to write about la....so ya.....stopping here.....

Hey Nicky.....if i knew how to find a GF....i would be glad to help you find one lah bro.....but ya.....you know la...i suck at it.....so ya.....bet u r a better experienced guy then me lah.....at least u had good times la......so ya.....lax la bro.....the most....after NS then find lor.....anyway....don't you find going after a girl over again is such a pain in BUTT/ BRain/ or whatever .....hahaha....u get what i mean la.....haha...okok.....gd luck to you...hahaha....wait for new bowling team recruit lor....hahaha....

2005-05-02T16:31:00.000+08:00

AArrgghhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.................BOREDDDD BOREDDD BOREDDDD!!!!

haha....ya...im practically home for the past 3 DAYSSSS....okok...besides saturdays when out with my mum for awhile....ya...im practically home......grrr......i wanna go out manzz.....lol

okok....dont really know what to write lah.....but ya.....will blog again soon....hahaha....maybe later???.....

Sianz.....schools gonna start in like 3 weeks???....DAMN!!!!

2005-04-29T22:39:00.000+08:00

Friday.....so fast...another week gonna end soon......

Arrghhh......my bowling is damn weird now...hahahaha.....it looks kinda ugly now...ya....as in WORST than before....hahaa....thats according to what cedric and jeremy said la...hahaha....and i got a freaking blister on my finger....oh ya... MIDDLE FINGER!!!....lol.....nvm nvm...at least im starting to feel slightly better about my game...though its still in one hell alot of a mess la.... think im gonna book more training from next week....coz no more team training on weekdays already...so ya....can take one -on-one on a later time during weekdays....okok....lets just hope i will progress faster manz......* praying* ....lolx....anyway....ugly ugly lor....got score can liao...haha...who cares.....

okok....erm...im kinda guai today la....after training headed home straight away.....donno why also...i kinda sweat alot today....hahaha....something wrong with me...hahahaha.....

OH no....its that same feeling again.... GOT SO MANY THINGS I WANT TO BUY!!!.......LOL....... sigh~~~.....too bad i don't buy 4D or TOTO....hahahaha.....lalalalala......ooopppzzz.....im so damn bored lah....so ya.....hmmm...wonder how long i can last till i actually start buying 4D and TOTO....hmmmm....nahhhhh....don care......till the day i buy than say lor....hahahahaha.......

Can money drop from the sky???.....lolx......

ok la....nothing much to write liao.....so ya.....shall stop here then.... you guys take care alrite.....cyazz

2005-04-27T00:13:00.000+08:00

Sianz sianz..... my bowling is back to a mess once again....sobxsobx....haha....nvm nvm....im ok....slowly take my time to train lor.....sometimes just cant help but to wonder my chances of staying in the team next year....thats all....haha...okok....dont think about it lah....

Ya....had training just now......

hmm....sent my car for repair today...yup...things went smoothly la....hopefully.....as in...no probs liao...at the moment...hahahah....

Suddenly feel like adding more barang barang to my car leh....adding some little cosmetic mods here and there...oopzz...hahaha....maybe not mods la....e.g. i wanna change that freaking weak horn...hahahaha.....den add some gauges.... ( so beng)..hahhaa...but nice....hahahah....okok...im just dreaming...say so much...in the end i wont do it one la...so ya.....nothing wrong saying though....hehehe....but ya...maybe the freaking horn i will change la...its like 15bucks only...so ya....

oh ya....found a new nice song.... Micheal "Bubble"...hahaha..... " HOME".... let me go homeeeeeee.....Lol... Talking about songs....donno why...have been damn tempted to get an ipod lately...donno why....partially coz it can also play in my car...hhahaha....sigh~~~.......i really think i print money sia...

lately has been pretty mono la....well...as usual i suppose...hahaha.....so bored at nights....plus i cant even sleep la....as in....not in the mood to sleep lor....hahaha.....

My hand got a freaking " Orw che " .....after letting the nurse " SUCK" my blood with the needle....donno why...got a patch of i think blood clod there.....

Kinda looking forward to weekend i suppose....hehehe......but ya....maybe not again....i might end up staying home....so ya.....

OKok...shall stop here then.....tk care ppl

2005-04-24T23:13:00.000+08:00

I've got my hair cut.....at last...ya....erm...but its kina short now.....but ya....short better....hahaha.....

Hmm....yup....another week gone....just like that....sigh~~~.....had a pretty disappointed week ???....haha...ya...having problem with my car....erm....chalet was cancelled....erm....bowling....feeling that my bowling is back on the down preiod once again...but ya...nvm....ive still got time to train and work on the game....i guess its for the better la....must trust my coach...hahah.....the unhappy thing was that....i've got a freaking WARNING LETTER lah~~~~.....just because.... i was ermm.... ON TIME!!!!!....or maybe 2-3 minutes late!!!!!!...........i mean....WTH lah.....ive got to work mah....plus...there was a traffic jam.....cant they understand abit and give chance or something like that??..... and ya....there is another thing that i was pissed (or maybe disappointed) with...related to the warning letter...but nvm.....better not say it....wanna know ??....ask me about it.....sigh~~~....

After training that day....actually went down to roger's place to play badminton with carl and shaun....haha...then after that tennis.....Wah LAo~!~~..... whole body still aching a little here and there manzz.....hahaha....im so damn super weak la....must really start excerising already lah....ahahaha

Watched " The Interpreter" yesterday.....it was quite a nice show la.....BUT!!!...for some reason...i actually fell asleep hahahahahahha......but ya....only for a short period....the part when the show got a little draggy i suppose....hahaha.....but ya...overall its a nice show la.....wasnt as complicated as i thought it would be...storyline isnt very broad....hahaha...donno how to explain...but ya...hahaha

Ehh....today....woke up at 2.30pm....well done....my day practically gone....hahahah.....there was no plans to go out....so was home all the while.....then had dinner at home....after watching F1....felt that i should do some excerice or wat..so ya....went to wash my car....haha....it was pretty dirty anyway....so ya....

Erm....haven been talking much to stupid girl lately.....feel abit drfited from her manz....sigh~~~..... nvm nvm..... see how it goes lor....

Ehh....for ur information guys..... im still learning how to take things easy....apparently...its starting to work out....heh heh heh heh ...... im making some progress ....so ya....give me time manz....i can one...hahahaha....or at least become...NOT TOO " THINK TOO MUCH"....heheh...

OKok.....shall stop here then.....

2005-04-21T21:31:00.000+08:00

Back !!!......Just Watched " Joey" ....haha....nice show....pretty lame la....but ya....hes good at being dumb in that show....okok....just hope i dont get addicted to it...hahah......

Had training this afternoon.....sigh~~....making changes to my game once again....nvm la...give myself sometime on it lor.....then felt that my current arsenal need some touch up.....the thought of replugging....is kinda sianzz....so ya....nvm la....see how it goes after remy comes back lor....use this 2 - 3weeks to work on my game lor.....so ya.....haha...okok.....i shall only stress on my bowling....while im on the lanes...haha....no point thinking or stressing it when im not mah on the lanes...haha....okok.....just train hard thats it.....lol

Hmm......having a medical checkup this saturday......heard got blood samples DRAWN out from us....hahaha....oooppzzz....arrgghhh....scared scared.....hahahaha.....

Think of it....this week is kinda fast ar....tomorrow friday liao.....so fast.....yup....suddenly felt that....school is so gonna start once again....OH DAMN!!!.....sianzzz.....this suckss......im so not looking forward to school manz....haha....coz got school...means....no income.....hahahahaha......arrgghh...nvm nvm.....school re-open then see how lor.....don't care lah.....okok.....

Shall stop here.....buaizzz

2005-04-19T00:34:00.000+08:00

Monday!!!..... a slow start for the week.....yup....

Ok ...lets see....i am so damn bloody pissed lah....hahaha....okok...not that bad la....not really a big issue ....

Sent my car for repair today....guess what.....after collecting my car....then i realise that the people did not do up my " Supposed to be done" repair....and in the end repaired all other stuff ......so ya....i've got to sent it down next week again....grrrrrrrr.....ya.....aiyah nvm....don talk about it liao....over le.....

After work....went down to PS to cut my hair.....at last...its SHORT again.....hahahaha.....damn short manz....i look weird....haha....but ya....i look weird all the time lah....so ya....doesnt really matter......

Haven been talking to stupid girl for sometime already manz......wonder how is she.....alrite ....maybe not that long lah....but still....it felt like damn long....hahhaa......ya....guess shes busy with stuff.......oh ya....

OEI!!!....if you see this ar!!!!...........call me when you're free HOH!!!!!!!!!!!......hahahahaha....im so damn super bored lah.......grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.....hahahah

okok....shall stop here.....cyaz

2005-04-18T01:17:00.000+08:00

Hi all.....back again..... this week has been a pretty long week for me.....

Erm....bowled a tournment this week....ya...one that got me so damn bloody disppointed with myself la.....ya....was so near to qualifying....but yet....things happened....i screwed up on the last day....sigh~~`....nvm nvm....shall let it be the past....yup.....learn from it lor.....

Been out the past 3 days.....watched 2 movies.....erm.....wasnt that bad la....erm......aiyha...nvm nvm....also donno what to say.....hahaha....well....would say...it wasnt that bad lah...lol...okok

Been wondering....why are there so many problems with some people that just seem alrite to you.....as in....you get friends around you....suddenly warning you about this person that person.... im like.... huh ???.....donno manz.....

BEen sleeping alot during the day lah.....slept at 6am last night...so ya...its like i slept at 6am in the morning.....

Erhhh.......actually i also donno what to write lah....but ya...just updating abit....before people start scolding me and ask me to please update.... hahah....okok....gonna stop here.....

2005-04-12T02:00:00.000+08:00

HI peepz....yaya....just a short note...haha.....

Erm.....think im kinda just being paranoid recently .....so ya.....paiseh ar.....

Really kinda feel stupid about whatever i've typed earlier on lah....but ya....was thinking back....guess i really wasnt thinking properly.....ya....guess i can only laugh it out.....how stupid and emotional i can get at times ???....yup....okok.... "Facing the wall thinking about the past" ....haha... Chinese = Mian Bi Shi Guo....something like that.....

And ya....hope i did not offended anyone....it was plainly rubbish that i typed...so dont bother alrite....

I'm really really Sorry if i offended that person......ya....erm....its really my fault this time round....i wasnt reasoning things out.....erm....i guess i shouldn't be talking too much.... had someone lectured me on this to realise my mistake....so ya....i should have just slowly let things progress.... i should have been more understanding....

Guess all this is coz....i feel.....erm.....there is just too little time left ?????.....ya i know....time will heal....but to me....at least wat i feel lah..... time aint on my side......i donno la....think i better stop,.....im irritated by myself...

Shall stop here.............tc all

2005-04-11T00:33:00.000+08:00

Hi BLOGGER.....here i am.....yaya....bored enough to blog again lah....so ya.....hopefully i can just type out some rubbish la......

People say.....good friends don't need to have too many.....yeah....kinda agree with that....but again....what if things happen with your good friend....so now what?....Go find a new good friend isit??.....sigh~~~....... Anyway i'm not refering to anybody or what so ever lah....just typing some rubbish .....so ya.....

I donno lah....i just felt that i have nobody to talk to right now....so all i can do now is to blog....i cant store things inside myself for too long....i'll just explode........i donno lah....sigh~~~.....ya.....i'm kinda feeling very "farn" now....ya....im not thinking too much la....not being sensitive or whatso ever la...... i just suddenly feel that.....im not an important person to anybody at all lah....or am i expecting too much ???...or being too *BHB* to expect anything......but why are there people that are important to me ???.....fark....what am i talking about again ???......AArrrghhh~~~~~

Sometimes i really wonder......how farking stupid and dumb can i be.....ya....roger's right....im a KKB....always screw things up....as usual.......Ong Shao Zong....WELL DONE!!!!.......

Anyway....im seriously just typing rubbish lah....or at least something that im feeling NOW!!...ya....im not thinking properly and logically.....just plainly typing......

I think its no point bringing up the past at this time.....what done is done.....guess i could try to look forward???.....trying....at least a brighter one ??.....hai`~~~~~~~

Damn~~.....i slept too much earlier during the day.....if not i can just go and sleep now.....sigh~~~....kinda feel like going out now.....yup...maybe.....i'll just take a drive out.....i donno....see how la.....or watch movie at home ?....sigh~~`...donno la..... why the hell am i feeling this way......damn it....so many question marks in my mind now.....what the hell.....

For the past few weeks.....i think many things had really changed....totally......if anyone wanna disagree with me....come....i will argue back with you......or maybe not the past few weeks....maybe say....a few months back.....things have started changing.....i donno lah...maybe its something wrong with me ???.....maybe ar.....guess im always the problem to things happening lah....since im such a KK.....always screwing up....

If only a person could go through modification like cars.....ya....i'll defintely go through a major overhaul manz......ya....im talking alot of rubbish i know.......

OKok....enough crap said....guess i'll just stay up to watch the last round of the Masters bah.....kinda missed golfing ....haha.....and archery too.....sigh~~~~

2005-04-10T20:39:00.000+08:00

Ya....back......Was home the whole day lah....erm....sleeping most of the time.....haha...

Am currently watching " What Women Wants"............Sigh~~~~......DAMN!!!.....if only i've had the ability that Mel Gibson have in the show.....all these previous disappointed or what so ever would not had happened.....and it might probabaly turn out good??.....sigh~~~~~~~......hahha.....alright alright.....im just dreaming lah k..... its not like i haven been dreaming the past 2 weeks.....or should i say....all the while ???....hahhaa.....ya....im dreaming all the time......

This show kinda reminds me of " HITCH"....haha...ya.....able to be like Will Smith in the show isnt such a bad idea also....hahaha....ooppzz....okok.....dreaming again....i know i know.....

OKok....im really so damn bored lah.....if only somebody could call me out for ice-cream ??.....haha...i donno....just kinda feel like eating ice-cream lately......maybe i aint in a good mood ??.....i donno.,.....but ya....just feel like going out with somebody to chill now.....but apparently there isnt anyone that i can call.....so ya.......Sigh~~~~~.....

Don't think that stupid girl would be free to go out also....so ya....that means ive got practically nobody in mind that i wanna ask to go out liao.....Haizz~~~~~~...... * SobxSobx*.....

I'm just out of my mind lah......just talking rubbish....so ya.....okok....back to show......sigh~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2005-04-09T01:20:00.000+08:00

Okok....so here i am blogging....ya...BUT!!!........sigh~~.....

Seriously donno what to blog about lah....sianzz.....or maybe donno how to write....haha...ya....

Today....when for training at yishun.....coach not around....but lanes were booked for us....so ya.....was just working on my " Feel" of the game....haha...ya....it felt alrite la...much better infact....but ya....still quite abit of errors here and there....but ya....slowly lor.....should be alrite lah....just try to work hard liao lor....really don't think i can be in the team next year lah....sigh~~~......

Nowadays.....like super bored at night lah....practically stoning every single night.....at least for today...i went to wash my car lah....so ya...not that bad.....but ya....here i am....stonin once again....but not as long as the other days....hahaha....ok....Wat the hell am i talking about ??????......

Trying to read up on a book now....you guys will sure laugh after i mention the title....ya... title is " Don't sweat the small stuff" ....Yaya... i know.....really one hell of a book you guys will throw to me if you guys had it in your hand backthen right ???? .....hahaha......seee.......at least im kinda trying to work on something that his bothering me for quite sometime lah....so ya..... support me lah!!...basket........still laugh ????.......hahahahah......

Having a tournment next week......but ya....not sure about my chances to qualify lah....but ya....must tell myself to focus and relax....just bowl!!!..... HAHAHAHA.....okokok.....ahhhh shudddupppp........!!!!! ( i learnt this from the book) ....in some way....hahaha.....

Feel like doing so many things manz......but ya.....the O2 XDA2 looks kinda interesting....hahah....ooppzz.....

Sigh~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm so damn bloody sianzzzzzz lah!!!!!!!!!!!!!.....sigh~~~~~.....if only someone could call me now....but ya....at this time....all koonings liaoz.......lalalalalalala.......im just mad lah......haha.....

BOred BOreD BOREd BOred BORed BorRED .........!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2005-04-07T00:46:00.000+08:00

AAAaaaaaRRRRrrrGGGGGgggHHHHhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2005-04-04T01:48:00.000+08:00

Hi all...im back again.....yup....3 entries in a day....Well dONe!!!...

Now.,...i just feel like writing out how im feeling now....ya....i don't have anyone to talk to right now....so the only place would be here.....

Okok....guess what....im still aint feeling any better lah.....just whacked another 2 panadol....sigh~~....still feeling kinda weak la......hope i'll be alrite tomorrow.....but ya....at least i still can blog and all...so ya.....

Honestly saying.....i really cant help but to think whats gonna happened between us manz.....but i guess....whats done is done.....cant erase it in anyway.....sigh~~.....maybe she needs some time ???....and i need some time ???....sigh~~....i donno alr la......sorry ar ppl....i know i damn irritating lah...keep saying the same thing....but ya....if u got a problem with it....den don read....its ok one.....

NOw im also afraid that i might have irritated her....or will irritate her.....but ya....can somebody please tell me what to do ????.....im really feeling damn blank now.....EMPTY!!!.....i really didnt expect things to turn out like this.....in the past...when this question was asked.....it has never turned out this bad....its always...after a few days....we are back to normal.....

Dear Girl......if you are reading this.....i guess.....maybe u need some time ???.....i donno.....but ya....i will not disturb u......but......if you think that you are alrite already.....could you at least let me know ??.....and erm....please do take good care of yourself k ??....

2005-04-03T16:16:00.000+08:00

Sigh~~~........Officially sick already.....Having Fever NOw!!!.....sigh~~~.......will blog again when im better..... whack 2 panadol liao....should be ok soon i think......ciaozz

2005-04-03T13:04:00.000+08:00

Ya....what a weird time for me to blog rite....just felt like blogging so ya....

i really really regretted asking her about all those stuff last week lah....sigh~~~~

Last night....things nearly went from bad to worst lah....really....for a moment...i was damn scared that......thats it lah.....sigh~~~ .....at least later on , she managed to really talk to me lah....so ya....and as usual....im always repeating myself....i donno why...but ya....she tells me that things are fine between us....i hope this time it really is .....somehow u guys might think that...why she so important right ??....erm....i donno also....but ya....she is that important....so ya........i know im repeating myself again....but i dont remember i said that before....

Now im kinda feeling weak....donno why....think i might be falling sick manz.....sigh~~~.....Sianzzz......

Sigh~~~.....really feeling damn confused about many things lah.....i donno lah.....sigh~~~......but i'll be alrite....don worry......really missed the time i talked to her....then now like suddenly nobody to complain at....sigh~~.....

k lah....will blog again....ciaozzz

2005-04-03T01:26:00.000+08:00

Bored BOred.....sigh~~`....ya....damn bored....sigh~~~ Jiii Mooooo!!!!

OK la....at least i kinda went out on today and yesterday lah.......

Last night after the dinner.....when down to some KTV at orchard....ya...my first time in KTV lah...haha...it was Justin's birthday lah....so ya.....oh ya....damn he sure can sing...hahaha.....no wonder he's my idol....hahah..... OU XianG!!!!!..... Den kinda reached home at 3.30am....ooppzz...ya...and my mum was up....

Today.....woke up late....after so long....for once....i woke up at 2 plus pm....hahaha

Ya....in the end....met up with Jie and Justin for dinner at town lor....so ya.....jie left early....then was talking to justin was loitering arnd at streets of orchard road...hahahahahhaa.......ya....but got home early la....coz that fellow flying next morning..... and ya....good lah...can go overseas to bowl.....and why the hell is everyone thinking that im going ar ???....basket.....damn demorolising manz.z.....

Damn damn dman damn sianzzzzzzzzzzzz......phone aint ringing....hahah....nobody call me one....hahahaha...... ooppzzz....

Hmmm.....suddenly was thinking abt bowling......really donno where my bowling is heading towards liao....i mean...kinda lost......heard that coach have chosen the few that will be in the 2 years training programme....so ya....from what i know....i might not be in it.....sianz....means that probably i will only be in the team for this year ???.....ya....no confidence that i will make it next year lor......so ya......though if in the 2 year programme cant get to bowl tournment...but ya...doesnt really matter mah....coz if im lousy....also like that....hahaha...bowl liao also no use....

aiyha....very mixed feelings....hahahahha....nvm nvm nvm...don think so much....just try to work on my game lor....

2005-03-31T21:06:00.000+08:00

Sianz..... this past few days have been freaking boring lah....ya....after work go home...sigh~~....bored bored.....

Erm...kinda started talking to her liao......yup...what happened is history lah....

Now....all i hope is that everything could go back to normal.....soon.....ya....like before.....

Hmm......ok lah...don really have much to write lah.....erm....training tomorrow will start at yishun.....but ....next week theres no training at all.....EuroMed....sigh~~....if only i could go Philippines with them....but ya....im not good enough also lah...so ya....stay and train in Sg lor......

After training still got some Dinner thing to attend to....so ya....sianz....

ok lah....aint gonna write much today......yup.... oh....feel like watching movie...damn long nv watch liao....after hitch....hahah.....

2005-03-30T01:26:00.000+08:00

Sis.....okok....i'll try to write something nicer k ?.....

Erm.....how should i start.....ok.... My car was sent in for Repair today.......erm....ya good stuff ???......maybe yes....was expecting a more troublesome procedures in repairing it.....but did not expect it to be settled in a day....so ya....sent in to komoco changi today....thought i have my car access there then book a date at the main service center to get it done....but ya....in the end...managed to get it done at changi branch. My Car was damn noisy......

Ya....for those who sat in it before and always hear me complain that its noisy....you guys kept saying its not....so i thought it really isnt.....apparently.....it WAS.....ya....coz i met one of the getzclub people....he looked at my car...and i sat in his.....mine was soooo much noisier lah....so ya.... NOW!!!..... its Silent!!!!..............hahaha....i think.....it doesnt sound like a SPOT car liao.....ahahah.....

But but but....nothing good happened lah.....when down to pick my car....then drove back to office.....guess what.....at the office carpark....i switched off the cd player....and realise that my steering wheel is giving me "squiky " sound....so ya....called them up.....in the end....i drove back to the center.....did a check on it....added some lubrication to the wheel....but ya....still got a little bit of the sound.....coz they told me that theres some tube in steering compartment that is kinda spoil ???.....ya....gotta wait for them to order the part for me......abt 1 mth......but ya....at least its not some big problem at all....plus later at night....i did not even hear anything from the wheel.....guess as long as the radio is on....you wont hear anything at all....so ya.....it felt like....one problem after another....how to be good stuff?????......okkok....maybe the main problem has been settled.....and afterall im just doing warrenty claim thats all......its still free to change the parts....so ya.....looking on the bright side....its good.....so ya..... still feel kinda weird about my car though.....like too quiet for me liao......when ram the accelerator......no feel one...the car just fly....no race car feel....hahaha....previously was noisy till like racing car ( without the performance)....lol

Okok....i dono why im typing so much about my car lah....guess im just too bored lah.....missed talking to her lah.....sigh~~~~

OH ya sis.....this trip to KL i did not get anything for you leh .....paiseh....did not even have time to shop for anything lah.....or should i say...barely even had time to sleep....everyday its like less than 7 hours of sleep....so ya.....IF...i said IF....i have a chance to go overseas again.....i promise to get something for you k ???....aniway 2-3 mths back i went to the same place mah....couldnt find any miffy stuff....so ya.....

Sigh~~.....am trying to put what ever happened behind....and ya.....im better liao.....but at times just wonder.....whats wrong that things just couldnt work out.....as in there are somethings that i dont understand at all....like what was lacking ???.....but again....whats the point understanding......okok.....at least i suppose we are still alrite ???....i hope....ya.....really missed talking to her lah....like suddenly im back into my own little world....with my ownself....ya....okok...wth....nvm nvm....i talking rubbish,....dont bother......

Just kinda dont know why this time round it really hurts more then before.......erm....was i really expecting too much of a positive outcome???.....was it because i gave myself abit too much of confidence in it ???......i guess so ar.....so ya....you people always scold me for being very negative.....SEE!!!!.....when you become positive....and when outcome is bad....how???.....*shakes head*........

ok la.....gonna stop here for today.....had training just now.....so ya....abit tired....so ya....hope i can sleep early tonight lah.....say 3am ??.....aahaha....okok....ciaoz

2005-03-28T03:28:00.000+08:00

S-H-I-T.....this is all im feeling right now.....&*%$^%$&%$#^$^$^$%&^$&^%*$

First ...this is not because of bowling....its another thing that you guys probably know lah.....and i really donno why im blogging about it.....perhaps i just need some place to write something....

I would really want to say something to all my dear friends who are currently in a relationship, please please please really treasure the person you have alrite......you will regret it when u lose it....and again i wanna "Pei fu " you all for being able to find that one person and be with him/ her..... Ya...coz i tink its like one of the most difficult task that i have ever met.....again...not being able to be with the person that you want may be saddening....but again....as long as she is happy....isnt it better ???......its better then having a forceful sort of relationship......ya.....ok....im kinda like lecturing myself....so ya.....i also donno what the hell im talking about but ya....im just typing aimlessly.....

Somehow i can really understand how nick is feeling back then.....so ya....bro....somehow we are always on the same boat one ar?.....sigh~~~~........ Getting in a relationship is really really a very very difficult thing......and finding one is really really not easy at all.....i guess its also abit on luck as who did you managed to find i suppose.....well...in this case...lady luck wasnt one my side....but ya....i guess i kinda got lucky on other stuff.....i suppose.....and ya....my coach told me one thing before..... Life is never fair at all....so ya....just have to live with it i guess.....we also don have a choice.....be happy with what we have......

To her........ if you see this......i wanna say that..... I;m really sorry for bringing that topic up again alrite.....though i already knew the outcome .....ya....guess im just being too " Optimistic" about it.....from the bottom of my heart....i really hope nothing affects anything between us alrite ????....i guess you are right lah.....friendship is more important......or at least.....you are the person who is more important to me......i may have said some wrong things lah........im sorry k???......

Why i agreed to it that friendship is more impt.....its like....back then....when i was with samantha.....i told myself.....if you ask me to chose between her and sam.....she is more impt....even though im not with her or what....just a good buddy......ya....i guess its not wrong to say that right ???.....afterall....i knew her so many times longer then samantha....so ya.....

OK....till know....i have no idea what the hell i have typing lah....so ya....if you guys cant take it....please just leave k.....don bother reading about it lah.......

It's 3.45am now....bloody hell.....does perfect 10 have to play all this " SAD" songs at this point of time......whats wrong with all this shit.....am i really that suay......FARK!!!!!.....this sucks manz.....ya i know....im always complaining that im feeling suay and all....but ya....its true what....things haven been going smoothly at all whhat......alrite....relationship we don say lah....what about bowling ????.....its in a mess now lah.....but what can i do.....been telling myself to slowly work on it already.....then now.....donno for why.....im affected by relationship issues once again.....i thought after sam.....its a good time to let me stop this kinda shit from happening to me for sometime......

Well.....i think i still lack alot of things that a good guy should have......but what can i do ???....Ya...i have lots of negative points lah....so ya......

i guess i should be alrite in a few days time lah......afterall this is not the first time this kinda stuff happened to me lah.....and i have always expected this kinda ending....so ya.....guess my immunity is much better now.....just that this time....it kinda hurt abit....i donno why....strange...but ya....its over already.....

There are so many things that i wish i knew how to put them in words....or even at least express them in some way or another....but ya.....i just donno how to.....but i guess.....i have already said whatever i could and squezzed out everything that i could already.....i guess.......useless means useless....so ya.....do anything more also wont help much......hahaha.......well done!!!....ok....what the hell am i toking about again ????.....oopppzzz....hahaha

Oh shit....somehow i think if she reads this ....she will be damn pissed with me lah....but ya.....hey girl....im really just typing rubbish k.....coz i couldnt sleep....so ya......erm....im just typing crap k....haha....im ok im ok.....don worry.......*smiles*

Okok....i;ve typed enough for tonight i suppose.....yup.....Bye!!!

2005-03-27T13:43:00.000+08:00

Hi People!!!!.............I'm BAck!!!!......haha.....got miss me ???....hahaha.....i guess not.......hahahah

Well....actually im still thinking what i can write about the trip lah.....coz actually theres nothing for me to write..... Its like....everyday when i wake up....it will be breakfast.....then head down to the alley.....and i would be at the alley till at night....only lunch break in the afternoon during oiling lor......

On the first day we reached there......we bowled our trios and doubles first....and guess what.....i was somehow damn kanjiong or what lah....i couldnt do anything properly at all.....BOWLED LIKE SHIT!!!.....hahaha...and i was kinda worried lah.....so ya.....

Till second day....when we start on out first MQ....heng manz....things starts to turn out better ....ya....but still not good enough......so ya......... At night when down to coach's room for debriefing.....and ya....the statistics kinda showed that im kinda the lousiest in the group lah....so ya....SIANZ~~~~~~.....but ya....nvm nvm.....i will work harder one.....hahaha....slowly make changes to my game lor......

Third day......11.50pm.............the whole bowling alley " Black-Out" ......and ya.....by the way its not the normal 24 lanes alley you see in singapore leh...its like a freaking 45 lanes bowling alley lah.....double storey with pool center one...........hahahaha........that time some of my teamates are bowling their MQ....halfway thru only.....so we were like...OH shit....what about the scores.....hahaha.....ya....luckily after about 20 mins....everything when back to normal.....and the scores were still there....so ya.....in the end...one of the teamate qualified in that squad.......

Sigh~~~...........tried but ya.....i couldnt make it.....sianz.....

The rest of the day is pretty much mono lah....so ya.....nothing much to write already.......

okok....damn sianz....gonna blog again......haha....ciaozzzz

2005-03-20T02:31:00.000+08:00

Wah....haven been blogging for sometime already ar......

Here i am.....gonna leave Singapore in like 6 hours plus......Going KL...hahah....

But going there is more like a learning trip than a more competitive trip....so ya.....anyway...better than nothing.....slowly learn lor....yup yup...afterall its the first time representing my country for something....hehe.....it still feels like a dream...so ya....* dont wake me up *

Erm.....donno why...head still kinda pain....ooppzzz...ya........

Hmmm.....really don have much to right lah....so ya.....holidays had officially started for Marketing STudents.....so ya.....so its back to only bowling and work.....so good....if only this could last forever....hahaha.....

Sigh~~`......sianz.....STuPID Girl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..........I'm SOOOOOO gonnnnaaaa MIsss You!!!!!!......sigh.~~~~~~~~~~~~ Sobxsobx......don ask me why....coz i also dono.....but ya.....hahaha.....ya like who cares....ooppzzz

okok.....ciaoz guyz.....tk care all....

2005-03-11T01:19:00.000+08:00

I am farking typing this post for the thiird time lah.....FARK!!!

Today...happily thought last day of school ...so ya...will be relieve, happy and all....BUT!!! fark ....today is really is really a SCREWED UP DAY LAH!~!!!....

WAs suppose to happily go drill my ball at remy's shop....thought can get new ball....fix the thumb problem that has been bothering me lah....

First: I have not settled my thumb problem lah....the drilling is not comfortable ....sigh~~...i donno manz.....it shld be my release lah....sianz....what the hell is wrong lah.....

Second:.... MY NEW BALL GOT CHIP OFF!!!.....after 3 shots..... and guess what.... the mechanic can happily tell me " this is not our mechanical fault....its your ball that flew to hit the pillar" ....i was like.... FARK YOU U POS!!!.....i mean....if the gutter is done up well....this shouldnt happen what....FARK!!!......

So later on at night.....I went down to pocket to ask james to do up my ball.....then happily....another news.....coach told me that....when go to Msia Open....we or should i say lousy bowlers like me....are only allowed to bring one ball up lah.....sigh~~`....sianzz 1/2 la.......

Then was suppose to get this thing that i wanted lha....managed to negotiate a group buy lah.....den now suddenly budget....feel like shit lah.....why cant i have the car like earlier.....so i wont be spending so much during the ivp period lah....like what...about 100 dollars a week on cab ???.....fark manz......

feeling damn shit now lah......donno whats wrong with me also....ya....i just not feeling good....sigh.``` Even blogger is trying to make fun of me lah.....THX AR.....

2005-03-11T00:29:00.000+08:00

MY INJURED NEW BALL!!!!!!!

2005-03-06T05:01:00.000+08:00

Its 5.00am in the morning now....i just got home not long ago....oopppzz.....hahaha

Watched "HITCH" at cine just now......i would its a show that is really worth every cent you paid....haha....ya....damn nice...and....kinda inspirational....haha.....it actually kinda got me thinking about somethings....yup....dont have to say lah....u guys should know what i mean....so ya.......oh ya....also saw Ray at cine....then happily.....she was watching the same movie too!!!....so qiao......hahahah

Was at the alley during the day.....trying to figure out what's wrong with my thumb hole.....so in the end managed to get uncle kenneth to help me check on it....changed abit on the drilling.....feels kinda weird though.....but roger helped me look at it....it was a much better release...so ya....donno manz.....kinda have to make sure that my bowling cannot drop ???....ya...something like that....not say its some kinda pressure or what....but i would say....its my aim to be a more consistent bowler now....and also to IMPROVE MUCH MORE!!!!....ya.... Would be going down to Remy's shop to drill my other ball....so ya....see how it goes lor.....will talk to him about the current problem that im facing....so ya....hope my drilling problem could be settled like ASAP!!!.....

Think my mum got kinda pissed with me when she called and i was at roger's place.....Maybe she didnt know that i was with roger at victors.....so ya.....she didnt want me to drive so far i guess....but ya....at least roger is an experienced driver.....so ya....he's there to guide me along the way ......

Later on, went down to OCC to meet up with ced and shena.....ya....interclub.....ermmm....it suddenly feels so " unfamiliar" to me....hahah.....strange....but ya....who cares.....anyway im bowling like shit now also....so ya.....

Its victoria's birthday..... though don really know her...but ya....now know already lor.....hahaha....we kinda ended up watching movie with the victoria's group.....then happily all the movie tickets were sold out, only the 2am one was available.....and back then was only 11plus....WTH!!!....haha...so ya....in the end....we ended up watching the 2am show......felt kinda bad through out the whole period....coz its like....mum is kinda pissed with me....but ya....sigh~~~.....sometimes im late....before that no phone call at all....but sometimes....they keep calling...haha....and its not like im always out that late.....so ya....nvm nvm

Yup......my mum is just worried about me....plus maybe its coz i just got the car recently....and they might think that im starting to havoc....so ya....i have no right to blame them in any way at all....if i do....im a piece of shit manz....hahah.....coz i dont...so ya.....hahahahahha

Hmmmm......i would again say that the movie is really a nice show.....its kinda touching too....but ya...too bad....aint watching it with " *************".....whoever that is (i also dono).....ahaha....but you get what i mean la ar ?.....haha.....sigh~~~~~

Just found out that one of my friend is actually attached.....hahaha.....erm....when i heard it...i was like... " WHAT!!!"....hahah....but ya....it was kinda more or less expected lah....BUT!!!.....why that guy~~~......sigh~~~......this world is really getting weird......hahahhahaa.....nah~~~......but ya....seriously.....i was kinda shocked to hear the " news or gossip"....about her lah....oh ya....its a she by the way.....hahaha......hmmmm.....anyway.....people change and all....so this kinda stuff....we can never know la ......so ya.....i guess thats all ive got to say......

Ohhhhh.....haven been blogging this much for sometime ar.....hahaha.....ok la ok la....ciaoz guyz

2005-03-04T00:11:00.000+08:00

Ciin and ME!!!

2005-03-04T00:07:00.000+08:00

Mr Retro!!!!

2005-03-03T23:56:00.000+08:00

Yesh yesh.....semester is coming to an end at last.....just left with a role play for comm skills....still waiting for photos from grpmates so that i could upload them....hahaha

After next week, really need a long break already manz.....as usual....life has been pretty much school and bowling....hahah....its ok......alot people is going through the same thing....or at least for the "school" part.....

I'm talking to stupid girl....hahaha....she doesn't know about it....oopppzzz...hahhaa...dont worry....im listening to you talking k....hehe.....

Hmm......donno what to talk about.....dont really have much to write also lah....i guess this few weeks is pretty much the same stuff going on lah....so ya......

K lah.....at least i bother to post something.....haha.....oh ya....will try to change my Skin....haha....Nur complaining about my skin AGAIN!!!!!!!.....lol

2005-02-27T20:48:00.000+08:00

well.....Sunday....met up with all the bowlers at leisure.....we had a debriefing on the IVP.

Yup.....overall we did well i suppose....though we felt that we should have gotten more medals....but ya....at least we won something.....

Was supposed to go to ciin's house to do project....but donno somehow last minute it was cancelled....so ya....and it was raining damn heavily at ECP.....so was kinda stucked at the alley....in the end....decided to bowl a few games with nick lor....so ya....

Left the alley then reached home at about 7pm....took a break....ya....PROJ PROJ PROJ....okok...must at least contribute something manz....so ya....

NExt Weeks is gonnna be the most STRESSFUL PERIOD manzz.....

Monday: Presentation.....Tuesday: Test....:Wednesday: Submission......:Thursday: Presentation....Friday: Submission....so ya....damn it manz.....sigh~~~.....

Most stressed up by the test on tuesday.....so ya.....some individual parts for my submissions next week....kinda felt that its not very well done....but in a way....i also donno how to improve on it already....sianz.....sigh~~~....this feeling suck.....but ya....nvm nvm....."ren"....

2005-02-24T23:53:00.000+08:00

Hmmm.....ok....Thursday is coming to an end................

That stupid girl....asked me to post something....so ya...here i am....typing something for her to read.....guess it would probably last her for 3 minutes???....hahahaha......ooppzz.....lalalallala *Grinz*..............lolx

sigh~~....think of it....tomorrow is submission for 2 projects....and a presentation tmr.....After the presentation....would probably have to rush down for training....hahaha....well done....hmmm....at least im keeping myself occupied....I THINK!!!....hahahaha.....

Very fast.....Chinese New Year is over already.....so ya....life OFFICIALLY back to normal for everybody already.....and for we marketing students.....its the most tiring 2-3 weeks now....so ya....BARE WITH IT!!!......sigh~~...now im feeling abit the useless....like still not helping much.....nvm nvm...try try.....but now...really wonder next semester....how my groupmates are gonna be like manz.....coz i think im most probably blacklisted already....im under the " NO NO" category in projectmates.....so ya.....sianz....what has happened to me ???.....from a good good....to a extremem NO NO....sigh~~~.....sobxsobx......

Well well........friends around have been telling me not to think too much.....and ive decided to really work on it manz.... OKOK...not the first time i said this....but ya....I'll try alrite ???.....hehehe.....

Okok....think i better go already....gotta work on my presentation speech tmr liao.....

Ciaoz guyz...cyazz

2005-02-21T22:46:00.000+08:00

IVP has officially ended.....Well done GuyS!!!!

TP is overall School Second.....Mens Team we got champion.....

Hmmm.....would say that the experience is the best i have ever had in my past 3 - 4 years of bowling manz.....the crowd and supporters were great....THANK YOU ALL!!!!!

Actually.....i'm kinda dissappointed lah....coz for 2 events.....my team missed out the Medal position by 50 odd pins.....sigh~~~......50 pins equals to lost of 2 possible medals for the school....sobxsobx......

Really had a damn great time i would say.....with the crowd.....hahaha......

Well....now its back to pia-ing project in school already lor....so ya......hope everything would be alrite in the end.....

k....ciaoz peepz....gotta go do project work later.....cyazz

2005-02-14T23:25:00.000+08:00

Happy Valentine's Day to all my dear friends......hope u guys enjoyed your day ar....haha

Had training at Yishun today....infact all the guy bowlers actually turned up.....good good....all damn onz one....ahaha....

Guess the chinese new year mood is more or less over already.....its back to schooling mood....yup yup.....as usual....haha....i've got nothing to write lah....so ya....just felt like posting something short.....yup....ciaozz peepz......

Eh stupid girl....guess whos back....hahahaha

2005-02-13T02:56:00.000+08:00

Day four of chinese new year....well....this few weeks haven been pleasant at all lah...so ya....

Had training this afternoon.....then went home to take a nap.....

Went to Lenny's place at about 9pm.....so ya....reached home at about 2.45am.....

Don't really have much to type lah....just felt like posting something....so ya....

Was on the way home just now....happily saw two taxi fighting to cut one another....then in the end....one of the taxi driver like not happy purposely went to bang the other taxi.....i was like.....WTF~~~.....plus both taxis got passenger in it....whats with the taxi drivers lately....cant they just "ren" abit.....both earning a living mah....what for....sigh~~~......then it was pretty scary to think of it lah....imagine if the bang was harder....the taxi skid and buang how ???......Sigh~~~......at least there was no injuries or what so ever....so ya....but again...what for....that little bit of anger....donno manz.....

Well.....i was wondering....isit really a good thing to be cant be bothered with issues that are against us?....i mean like say there is this somebody who is always targeting at you or so....would you throw ur temper??....or just...let it be lor......a friend was saying that at times i've got to just show my temper ....( forget what issue was it on).....but i was like.....i mean....if you can dont really care about it.....isnt it better?....why go make urself so damn bloody pissed....no point mah....

Erm.....for example my tagboard thing....i was initially damn pissed by all this unknown entries....but its like....now...just leave it alone lor.....if they really like to tag so much...den go ahead lah....now that they know they are not being welcomed....and still wanna tag....well i guess....it reflects on how they are....and not me....Afterall, this is my BLog....so ya....if i know the person personally ....then its ok lah....but now....hahaha.....i've got nothing to say....haven seen such incident in blogs yet....maybe they starting a new trend .....hahaha......

2005-02-12T03:03:00.000+08:00

Sianz.....feeling damn pek chek lah......

Well......groups mates are officially unhappy with me lah.....i was actually told by someone else who is my senior lah....well done!!!.....

I was told to confront my leader on this issue.....but again....For what....my name is smelly enough to her already what.....what for i confront....i mean....its like since im given an Attitude to this.....dont expect me to go and please you and all......

People complaining that im not doing work in the project group....so ya....i agree that i did not do alot....but again....they did not give me work to do.....ya im suppose to ask right ???....but ya....why cant they just give me work and i'll do right ??....WTF.....its not like when im asked to do something "those few only"....at least i still got it done what....not like i never do it at all.....

Back then during holidays......i mentioned that i wasnt able to meet up with one of the members....its not like i cant meet....its the member who cant.....in the end.....what i get was attidtude problem given to me from the leader lah....and not her.....wth.....both are in wrong....but im the one who kena???....WTF is this........

Rushed back to do the part that day.....or should i say i tried wadever i could ......like say a simple write up or say at least i try to work out something.....it might not be anything good....but at least i tried......den nvm,.....next day ....they got it done.....so i asked...."did u recieve the file i sent"....she said no....den i was thinking.....so whatever i have done was like WASTE OF TIME LAH!!.....WTH lah.....CB!!!

Let me ask....if say.....u always got a member who is late and all....though knowing its her trademark?....will u still get pissed and all...???.....i bet most would be right ???.......Then why is it that the leader aint giving any attitude problme to that person......and im still the only one who always kena.....where im there for all meetings....

Its like....you think after all that AP given to me.....you expect me to happy happy go ask..." What can i do for you mdm".....Pui~~.....

People will say.....you think in the working world you can be like this.....MY ANSWER to this is very simple.....you can never compare this with the real world.....in the real world....we talk about money.....when it comes to money it would be a different issue as everyone's aim is to earn a living right ???....therefore conflict management would be a total different way here.....its a total different story.....and dont try to say "oh....this reflects how you are in the real society"....eh....BULLSHIT!!!!

Well i guess now......its my peer appraisal that is gonna suffer lah......what can i say....bo bianz lor....well....i may be wrong lah.....they have their point and all.....but i believe this aint fair at all lah....but ya....guess its too late to say anything....but ya....nvm......

Guess everything all started because of the first 3 weeks of school where i was gone with all the bowling stuff.....i agree lah....my fault for not checking out with them regarding project at those days....but ya....over ler....anyway i never regret leaving that 3 weeks for bowling....so ya.....nvm nvm....im the bad person here lah...k......

2005-02-08T02:23:00.000+08:00

Hey sis.....paiseh ar....so happened that when im gonna blog.....that poor little BOI is back in action....haha.....ke lian him leh....*Yawnz*......since so hum ji.....only dare to post in tags, let him say whatever he wants lah....eh CLOWN " feel free to write more alrite"....oh ya...NEED ME TO DEDICATE A TAG BOARD FOR YOU NOTZZ??????...hahaha......like i said....since you got so many things to say....come down find me lah....hum ar ??...lai lar......NBCB....your mother or father really never give you name ???.....wait....or you got no parents ar????.....say la.....sigh~~~.....coz i believe if u have ar...i bet they never teach the right things manz......feel sad for you....

Oh ya people .....this boy here is damn farnie leh......my parents got money let me use...he jealous ar?....eh....THEY ARE MY PARENTS....not urs.....hahaha....WHY?....ur PARENTS cant be farking bothered with you isit..... oh ya...so what if im not rich???.....SO???.....hahaha....at least i know i'm enjoying what i have what....haha....you got a problem with that again?....hahaa....jialat leh you.....

This kinda people ......well....do all this....making himself look like a piece of shit nia....or should i say.....he actually want you guys here to pity him lah....haiyo....just let him be alrite.....he has no where else to write his shit....so ya...let him write all he want..... LOLX

OK.....THIS SHALL BE MY LAST REPLY TO THIS SHIT.......hahaha....DAMN CHILDISH CAN!!!....hahahahahahhahahahaah......at least my post looks long ....after so long....eh CLOWN!!!....THANX THANXX

Aniway, afterall this blog is just for myself....so ya.....

Okok....wishing all a happy new year in advance......eh.....went midnight shopping with my family today....haha....we actually went to 6 places lah....prawns in singapore are out of stock...hahahaha.....

Sianz.....this year new year don't seem to be that "relaxing"....too much work on hand manz....sigh~~....but guess many people are going through the same thing lah...so ya.....guys...must ren!!!.....the sem is gonna end real soon...so ya...bear with it alrite.....

2005-02-02T22:44:00.000+08:00

Erm....you "oh so great fellow".....first....my friends didnt huan tio you in any way hoh?....u got anything....aim at me can already.....and ya....stop making yourself look like a piece of shit lah....i pity you leh....piangz.....

First qualifier or Last Qualifier......still qualifiy right ??.....you really don understand the meaning of qualify ar??....jialat leh.....why??....you everytime fail to even qualify ar??..... ( my dear friends, im not trying to be hao lian here....just banging somebody....lmao)

Well...i guess you really don have a life ar......EH!!!.....GEt a Life lah!!!!.....seriously leh...i pity you leh....have to come to this point....disturb people but don dare to tell who the FARK you are.(oh ya....ask you something ar...your mum never give you name one isit????) ....sigh~~~

....Dare to come people's blog to post rubbish don dare to give name.....what kind of person are you manz....hum ji or bo ji???......you not happy or what ar....come down to my school find me lah.........you really think you CLOWN ar?? oh wait...did i just said CLOWN....Pui~~ you dont even fit to be one manz.....

OK....shall not waste my time typing any more shit about this kinda things lah.....oh ya...see....im typing SHIT for you to see.....lolx.....

2005-02-02T01:45:00.000+08:00

I'm so damn stressed manz.......so much project work....yet so little time......This few weeks would be having intensive training....shiiong manz.....haha.....

Sigh~~~.....went to sports council for an interview today....sigh~~....things didnt turn out good manz....this suckss......but ya......sigh~~...guess i've got to face it i guess......

Wonder whats wrong with these few people manz.....seriously weirdos....oh ya people....."Their ANG MOH is so damn freaking "GOOD" leh.....*clap* *clap*.......don blame them lah k.....they are just a bunch * should i say the same person* who has no life at all.....to actually come to tag at my blog.....hmmmm....well well....maybe "TAGBOARD" is paying them to tag at my blog.....lol

Training tmr nite at leisure again.....so ya.....sigh~~~~~~~.....TIRED!!!!!!!....

2005-01-28T23:33:00.000+08:00

Erm.....well....first i need to know..... Lec1 : can you just state your name next time ????.....

OK....i know you meant well alrite....its just that i felt that you are jumping into conclusions at times....

........What makes you think that i am pestering my parents???......and i do not see the link in terms of me FORCING THEM!!!......because if they do not one to get the car.....what ever i say will not help it......

.........What makes you think that i'm a nag???........

For your information, even the one who getz irritated would be my mum.....i've got to admit that my mum got irritated by me once....BUT.....my dad is the one who is always starting the conversation on the car......my dad irritates my mum too alrite......my mum starts the conversation with me about it too......

Erm....another thing.....so now you think that i am just a typical soilt brat who doesnt know the value of money right ???.....sorry then....you are wrong.....OK..... And what actually makes you think that im not working at all......

ALrite .....the part on the working to get my own car think....i have to agree with you.....thanks for the advice.

SO what if i get look down by people.....Does that make a difference......not say that at this point nobody is looking down on me.....i have always been looked down on by people on many aspect.....but again....if i even got to let this affect me....i might as well go and die ......if they like to look down on people so much....then go ahead.....let them be manz.....do you think i give a damn at all????......

If haveing your parents get you something means being looked down.....then i guess everyone in this world is constantly being looked down lah.....

I understand that peer pressure did affected me in someway.....if you wanna talk about car...fine....does this means that i've got to look down at every single friend of mine who is driving now.....if i do so....what becomes of me ???....a stupid jealous piece of shit????......

Again....thanks for your concern....i know you meant well alrite.....no offence intended.....

Well well....back to my normal post......erm...guess that is good enough to tell you guys how my day went lah ar......so many things that is happening lah.....aiyah.....i donno how to put them in words lah.....its like....things just didnt went smoothly at all lah..... was suppose to send something overseas.....but in the end got problem with the delivery process....so ya....guess that don't have to be done already lah....sianz....what the hell.....and i thought life was getting better manz.....looks like it aint that great afterall......sigh~~~~........

Ciaozz peepzz.......

2005-01-27T22:08:00.000+08:00

BOring day at home......so sianz.......tomorrow's project meeting is cancelled....so ya......hope can get the work done before leader come back.....arbo sure kena from her one....haha

I guess today aint that great/BETTER afterall........

Wonder who's lec ???.....but ya....guess i didnt make myself damn clear or what lah....i DID NOT " FORCED" my parents to get a car or something lah....sigh~~~.....i said earlier on....there are things that i donno how to explain and don't really wanna write about it in the blog lah......sigh~~....nvm nvm....say too much also no use one lah.....i just let myself be the bad BOY here now lah....its ok lah.....being good aint helping anyway....so ya....OK....im a BAD boy .....WADEVA!!!!!

Felt like arguing back lah....but ya....SIGH~~~~~.......nvm nvm........oh forgot....im always in the wrong one.....so ya.....fine fine

Feeling damn stressed still....donno why also.....SChool work is killing me (not like im doing any thing though....haha....guess im just running away from it) .....next weeks school training is like tuesday, wednesday , friday, saturday and sunday.....ya....sianz.....wonder what will happen if i tell my group members about it manz.....they sure not happy one....coz this sem due to bowling....i've been missing quite abit.....sigh~~~...how manz..... unless they aint gonna be meeting till late at night for those days lor.....

Stupid girl~~~~~...........when the hell are you getting your ass back here.....grrr....miss you alot manz....i've got nobody to talk to can......quick lah.....come back....sigh~~~~~

Guess i aint gonna give a damn about whats gonna happen about tomorrow lah......tomorrow's gonna be a better day ???....ya ya....MY ASS!!!!!

2005-01-27T01:53:00.000+08:00

Well well........half the holiday is gone......most of them have just left for thailand with the school.....so ya....BUT!!!....i'm given work to do for the project....sianzz manz....spoils my whole holiday lah.....its only cheryl and me who are in singapore....so ya......

Watched Elecktra with davy on monday......i would say it was so so only lah....till now still don't see the " MArvel" feel in the story leh.....not like some mutantation thinggy or what also.....hahaha....okok...nvm...its just a comic character....okok....

Got my hair cut.....erm...its like shorter than ever lah....haha....but who cares.....

When down to the carmart to meet ben today.....sigh~~~....in the end....more confusion and now its like.....dont even know what to get la.....guess...maybe a new car better.....but afraid of getting tied down or will lose alot....sigh~~~....donno manzzz.....

Been feeling damn broke lately.....AGAIN!!!....hahaha.....sianzz~~~~~........donno manz......
OH ya.....my earlier post regarding the car thinggy with my parents.....my bro happily just tell my parents about it lah....WTH!!!.....its like...aiyha.....nvm....also donno how to say manz.....suan le suan le......just feel kinda restraint to say things at times manz.....sigh~~~......nvm nvm......

NOw im just kinda feeling stressed up by many things lah.....not to say school work plays a part lah.....but no doubt....the car issue is really making me affected in someway i would say....but ya.....its not a simple thing manz....after reading up on stuff....owning a car is hell lot of money involved.....plus not say im of a rich family or what....or say strike TOTO or what also manz.....sigh~~~.....not just the car price....so many things....the interest itself is a killer already.....den its like....insurance....this and that......damn ~~~~

I just felt that cant it just be settled and get over and done with.....but again....considering all the financial aspects involved....it cant be done that way....it really take alot of commitment manz....sigh~~~.....now i really donno how things gonna be like....isit really such a case where once i say something....it would turn out bad....like usual.....sigh~~~....does that means that im not gonnna get the car???.....i donno manz.....Sigh~~.....nvm.....

Don't think i wanna do any work tonight already lah....guess i really just enjoy the time resting and all....and enjoy the 1 day left for me to slack.....coz i guess i need to meet cheryl in school to do project on friday already.....sigh~~~~

Tomorrow would be a better day i guess.......

2005-01-20T22:11:00.000+08:00

A break at last......ya.....Mid-sem is not over yet.....but more or less.....BUT!!!......there are alot of people that finish their mid-sem already lah.....sigh~~~......well....we cant actually complain coz we do not have final exams....hahah....so ya...... LAst paper would be next monday.....so ya....for now....just try to really take a break from the project and all lah.....i guess after next week its gona be a super tensed a stressed up 4-5 weeks already .....sigh~~~~

Feeling damn sianz.....kinda pek chek lah.....its like....im practically thinking about the car like everyday lah.....and happily my dad yesterday kinda say till might not get a car.....i mean....HUH!!!.....you were the one who said gonna get lah.....F*** la....i donno manz.....see how it goes lah.....but one thing for sure lah....im seriously not in the mood to even study after he told me that last night lah....sianz.....sibei sianz......&^*^&$%&%&*$#%&^^$%*%*&^%$^$%^

Well.....i hope that doesnt happen lah....i donno lah.....coz if that happens ar....i donno manz.....sure war with my parents one..... ( ya i know....im such a infilial son....blah blah blha )......its just my ANGER at this point of time lah.....OK!!!!.......sigh~~~.......i donno manz....super sianz lor....no mood for anything lah.... Well.....people who read about this might just start saying me and all.....but ya....there are things that i dono how to explain.....and i rather dont have to say it lah....so ya.....okok....for a moment i start to think about year 2005 already.....hmmm.....guess it will still be better then 2004 ....coz 2004....SUCK BIG TIME!!!!......

Team Singapore....Ole Ole Ole Ole!!!!!.......

2005-01-16T21:55:00.000+08:00

Hahaha.....yaya....Singapore won.....some might be wondering why the hell would i even mention about Soccer right?....haha....guess what.....i also donno why....hahahaha

Its only this kinda major events that i will watch i think...haha....weird weird....but who cares....Team Singapore WON!!!.......hahahaha......

Back to business......TOMORROW is MID-SEM......i HAVEN START AT ALL!!!!!!......im so gonna die lah....look at the time....Arrghhh....hahaha.....but i guess im always like that one lah....so ya....cant blame anyone.....just hope i could finish studying later lor....sigh~~~....okok....cannot cannot streessss......( like real only!!!!! )

Sigh~~~.......i cant wait to get a car lah.......but really wonder when then can i get it manz....at least another month ???.....sigh~~~.......sianzz....donno manz......just hope that my parents dont last minute cancel off the idea can already.....( CHOI!!!!!)......hahaha.......k ciaozz peepz.....cyazz

2005-01-15T02:15:00.000+08:00

Yup Yup......Hi peepz....im blooging at last!!!.....Damn!!!......at last....a super stressed up week has come to an end.....handed in 2 journals and 1 report this week. Next week is Mid-sem test lah....and i happily haven even start a thing lah....WTH!!!!.......sigh~~~..........this whole week was damn stress mainly coz of the 2 journals....then happily tuesday had a comm skill observer thinggy to write a report in one working day.....so ya....it makes it a total of 3 in a week.

The last 2 were handed in today lah......not forgetting the 2 quizes this week....but ya...and of course....i never study lah....hahahaha....so ya....

After school, was too bored....so went over to davy's house to meet him go out later.....happily he lazy to take bus and MRT.....ask me drive his mum's car.....so i was initially damn nervous lah....i mean its not my car mah....but ya....guess wad......i drove the car to town ....hahaha.....would say it was damn shiok lah....hahaha..my parents donno about it.....guess they will probably scream at me if they know it lah....so ya.....lalalalla.....hahaha....

Erm....actually kinda went car hunting with my parents last weekend.....wow!!!....was like....at last....getting a car!!!......yay!!!!..........but then....basket lah....was just looking looking then now....they cant even tell me whether they want me to get a USED car or a NEW car......SIGH~~~~~~~~~~~...........i really wonder if i really can get it notz.....im also kinda worried about the financial aspect of owning a car lah....plus my parents aint rich at all....so ya....HOW MANZZ!!!.......but i want a car.....sigh~~.....this week itself.....i think i have spent about 50 dollars on cab ???......ya....WTH!!!.....my monthly spending on cab i think is a few hundred dollars lah.....at least 200 ???...more or less there i think......WTH!!!!.......sigh~~.......

Now my dad suddenly say after chinese new year then buy car.......i was like.....HUH???.....its like....thought now COE drop then is the time to buy mah.....Sigh~~`.....donno manz.....then when i wanna really sit down to talk to them about the financial part of it.....they ......arrghhh.....donno lah.~~~~.........why cant i just strike 4D for once.....sigh~~~............sianz sianz.......... can say that i have been thinking about the car practically almost everyday lah....not say you guys dono...with my kinda of character....i think alot lah......DONNO LAH!!!..........but then look on the bright side....at least the chance of getting one is so much higher now....unlike before.....hopeless....soo ya....guess i should be damn happy about it lah.....hahaha

2005-01-08T02:54:00.000+08:00

Helo peepz.....help.........Proj is killing me like mad lah!!!!!..........sigh~~~~

Well.....haven been blogging for almost a week?....yup....hmmm hmmm....wat can i say.....well....its like 2.55am in the morning.....i kinda just got home....hahah....well done!!!!.....yup...went bowling with davy at tamp safra..... then ate supper at sempang bedok.....luckily we took the tables inside....coz it started raining after awhile.....so ya....Phew!!!.

Ok.....i have been waking up like 7am in the morning for the past few days lah....its crazy.....damn damn....and i'm always going school so early.....WTH!!!......

What can i say.....things have been pretty so-so for me lah.....kinda had abit of an arguement with my parents just now again....its regarding ....as usual....THE CAR!!!......hahaha.....well done.....sigh~~.....my mum actually pop up this suggestion that if the installment aint that high....den maybe can get....so ya.....managed to find something decent i think???.....but my dad said.....no korean cars....i was like.....grrrrr.....then what you want manz.........

I suddenly just feel like buying 4D lah....hahaha....nah.....i DON'T think i will go to that point YET lah....hahaha.....i dont gamble remember....oh ya....im a boring person tooo.........

For now.....im just telling myself to relax abit lah....coz its weekend.....so im just trying to relax for now.....next week will be a heavy week.....a few reports.....DAMN!!!!....the week after.....MID-SEMESTER TEST!!!!!...............sigh~~~~~~~~~~~

Well well......actually ar.....im starting to look for a so called partner already lah ( BUT NO PROGRESSION) .......hahaha.....okok fine....so whats new right?????........but ya........wadeva manz * sacarstic look*......lolx

This week has been kinda long for me manz....all those waiting and all.....blah blah blah.....yup....sunday coach is gonna announce the IVP team 2005.....yup....guess im in lah....just that which team and who will be my doubles partner....so ya....but well....i guess.....it doesnt really matter bah.....i think!!.....well.......c how things goes lor......the whole idea is to bowl well lor....haha...

Eh stupid girl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.......hahah......call for fun want......bleahs....

2005-01-01T23:21:00.000+08:00

HAppy New YEar!!!!.............................Sigh~~.....what a lonely new year.....sigh~~~......

Ever since school life went back to normal this wednesday........the only word i can find in my brain is only " STRESS"...............WTH!~!!.............deadlines are seriously madness lah.....sigh~~~.....at least im kinda done with my CDS assignment.....12 page....haha....better than nothing lah.....but ya....there are i think 2 presentation next week......2 individual dues.....WTH!!....arrghh....i don even know what other things im suppose to do lah....sianz.....sigh~~~~~

Kinda also cant wait for the stupid NY selection results to come out.......really wonder if i stand a chance anot.....but looking at it....aint having much chance at all lah....but still.....sigh~~~....donno how to explain also leh......sigh~~~.....if only i haved bowled super well to qualify the first part and just get in.....haha...but ya....wat kinda standard i think i have to bowl that well manz....sigh~~~...... okok wait.....my this post seems to have alot of " Sigh~~" .....haha....but ya....who cares.....

2005!!!!!......nah....aint that good after all lah.....so ya.....or should i put it this way..... 2004 SUCKSSSSSSS.....................okok......maybe 2005 might be slightly better????...Sigh~~~....donno lah........Stress manzzzzz

2004-12-30T01:12:00.000+08:00

After 3 long weeks, bowling stuff kinda comes to an end for awhile. Never bowled so many events in 3 weeks before. Phase 2 of the NY selection ended on tuesday, Sigh~~~~.....doubt i have a chance of getting into the Team lah...so ya....sianz......nevermind lor....if cant also bo bianz....so ya.....at least i kinda think i tried my best???....i think....at least the four days....i was really telling myself to focus....and not get affected by other stuff....so ya....SIGH~~~...sianzzz

BAck to school today......early morning lesson....9am...WTH la....nearly late.....went into lesson like a blur cock....took me about an hour to know what the hell is going on lah....to my suprise....I've got to hand in an assignment for my cds next week lah....WTH!!!!....i was like....super stress......at least my tutor was pretty understanding and supportive in a way....he didnt give me that " kiam par look"...so ya.....so i was like....relax...can do want......

After lesson, straight away headed to my " familiar ground" ....BUSINESS BLOCK...hahah....aniway i was at IT BLOCK.

I was outside the classroom....nobody was there....was like dont tell me no lesson ar???....haha....den luckily the tutor appeared....ya...there was lesson....and ya....small group and luckily my group was first....so ya....When to for breakfast at bizpark.....to my suprise AGAIN!!!...groupmates heppily tell me that there is no A&P tutorial....suppose to be at 2pm....so ya....den its like.....I FINISH School at 11.30 lah....WTH......ahahaha......but AGAIN.....grpmates said that we gotta to go Suntec carrefour to do a fieldwork for our individual journal....so ya....12plus we went down to suntec......guess what....AGAIN LAH!!!.....suprisingly....Carrefour is closed for stock taking on 28th and 29th........

So you think the surprises ended ar......N-O...NO~!!!!!!!!!!!

Managed to meet up with stupid gal today.....AT LAST!!!.....was suppose to meet her abit later....but since i ended early....so ya....thought i would be spending my evening with her lah....AGAIN!!!...to my suprise ( blah blha blah blha blah ).....she suddenly told me in the evening she got to meet a friend to attend something lah....so i was like.....grrrrrrr......BO BIANZZZ also....hahahaha

Watched "without a paddle"....and ya....this 2 weeks i have watched a total of 5 movies lah....well done!!!!....WTH!!!.....hahahha . The movie was rather boringi would say....not exactly funny lah...so ya....DONT WATCH!!!.......oh ya....Blade trinity was kinda lousy i would say....not very fantastic.....its like those "anticipate-able" kinda story....so ya.....

AFter the show.....she accompanied me to makan...haha..weird....one stupid princess watch me eat dinner ( or lunch? ) .....hahha....not bad ar....then after that she left to meet her friend....then i took a bus home lor......

Stupid boring bus ride......ya....reached home at about 9pm......start to stress about work alr.....gotto send an e-mail to my tutor regarding some donno what topics learning issues relfecltions kinda shit lah....so ya.....plus before that....i was doing my CDS assignment....only 1/4 done.....just sent the e-mail....was a few mintues late....but should be ok lah....i hope....so ya....

IM SO DAMe BLOODY TIRED LAH!!!!.........sigh~~~......must try to work on the assignment tonight lah....so ya.....next week due leh....sianzz......sigh~~`....cant help to think that my chances on the selection aint high....so ya.....sigh~~....sobxsobx........

2004-12-23T22:58:00.000+08:00

Christmas is coming!!!!...........Merry christmas to all in advance.....just in case i dont blog on the next few days....hahahah

Hmm.....today ended the phase 1 of the NY selection....so ya.....watched movie on both days lah....same cinema somemore...haha.....wednesday was " NAtional Treasure" , today " Kung Fu Hustle"......yup......both are nice....too bad didnt get to watch blade trinity........nvm.....see how lorz....

Happily i've got to watch the kung fu hustle ALONE lah.....coz last minute got people join....then in the end...i was like....i knew im gona be the one that have to sit alone...so ya...nvm lor....someone have to give way also mah....so ya....i sit infront alone lor....the others are behind me that row....

Erm....first day.....happily when i step into the alley...when to registeration counter....first person i see....SAMANTHA LIEW!!!!......i was like..... *&^$%*&%$#&^*%^$*&%$#&*^$%*^%&.....haha.....damn suay lah.....was expecting it in a way la....so ya.....gladly....i had good company on my lanes and that couple are far away from me....heh heh.....

Ehhhh.....tomorrow....got party.....donno wanna go anots leh....sianz....hahahaha......oh ya....

Actually blogging today for the sake of it....coz haven blog for sometime already mah....so ya......sigh~~~....shitz manz....im so gonna die la....so many days never go school.....overwhelming projects is seriously madness lah.....damn!!!!

2004-12-20T01:01:00.000+08:00

Had training this morning.....was a frustrating one though.....target practice....but i suck at it manz.....later on....did some tuning to my ball.....hopefully it would be working by now.....den later on deceided to open lanes to work on my game.....luckily coach was around to help.....he kinda fine tuned some of my errors.....so ya....

Suppose to meet stupid girl today one....but ya.....so ya.....hahaha....nvm la...she's recuperating from that weird jetlag of hers....hahhaa.....werid girl....waking up at weird times one....sort sort....hahaha....ooppzzz...GO SLEEP MORE LA U !!!!!

Hmm....got to drive my uncle's subaru today.....wow.....damn cool....damn nice....hahahah....the bloody pick up is so much better then my dad's car lah....hahahha.....GONNA make sure i drive more next time already manz.....heh heh...aniway he supports me on that so ya.....lalalalalala

Donno why suddenly im kinda back to be stress-up about my bowling ??....strange eh....like kinda losing confident already....nvm nvm....think i need a break......don think so much lor....so ya.....erm.....guess things should be alrite after coached helped abit here and there....so ya.....

Boring!!!.....Home whole Day!!!!

2004-12-19T01:06:00.000+08:00

Yayaya.......am home the whole day lah......haha...i woke up at 2pm plus....haha....coz slpt at 4am....was talking to stupid girl last nite...haha...after so long......

Erm.....later on.....at about 6plus....i think i went back to sleep again....OOppzz...ahahahha

Woke up at 9pm....watched the ch8 show...hahha....lame...but ya....entertaining lah....so ya....

At night was " You've Got Mail" ......nice show i would say....too bad i didnt get the chance to watch it last time....but ya....very nice show indeed......

Have been bowling pretty much lately......kinda learned alot of things ....both physically and mentally.....and ya....roger was always there to tell me wats wrong with me....from there i learn lor.....especially during the 3 days of Junior classic....he told me alot of stuff that i didnt realise that was affecting me.....SUBconciously......damn!!!

NOw i would say.....the fall of my JC .....mainly dues to my lack of focus manz....seriously hate myself now when i look back and see....why cant i just focus myself for the 8 games during the 3 days.....sigh~~~....why why why why!!!!!

OKOK.....im fine...don worry......ive got lots of work to do with my bowling now manz.....gonna go down to peices of my game.....i think now for me is MENTAL and TARGETTING......
hahahah.....

OOKOK.....im really ok...don worry manz......ciaozzz

2004-12-18T01:54:00.000+08:00

Today is actually the 5th month...haha....but im proud to say that....I'M OK ALREADY!!!!...

Sigh.....Junior classic ended already....as usual....didnt make it lah...sianz....AARRRGHHH!!!!......damn pek chek....

Really wonder whats wrong manz.....do i really need a physchologist to help me do something to my freaking brain ???.....im seriously having a damn weak mental.......damn......

Today....she came with him......i was just feeling kinda weird.....hope its normal lah......was just wondering if she was the one that affected me??....or just that i wasnt focusing much on the games as i know im hopeless alr.....hmm.....maybe its my focusing lah.....not really her .....so ya.... Coz i wasnt bowling well the 4 games before i saw her mah....hahahahha

When i got home later on at night.....the first thought that came to my mind was that.....i wasnt focusing enough/ at all today......so ya.....heh heh.... bro if u r reading this....u r wrong....bleahzz.....hahahah

I noticed something.....i seem to be interested in the " S " .....my past crush or wadeva....seems to be having S in their initials....hahaha....WTH!!!!!!.....

Oh ya....got my skin changed.....CINDY!!!! did for me....hahah....thanx manz....!!!!!!

Alrite nothing much to write.....so ya.....just wanna test out the new skin...hahahha.....

Junior Classic......

2004-12-15T01:06:00.000+08:00

Yup.....gonna bowl JC tomorrow.....this time.....i really wanna make it a different one manz.....hopefully like KL....can accomplish that same thing....hehe......sigh....

Think of it....Me and Jamie......if only Chris leng.....never come and disturb us during the games....we both might have top the field....i mite have won at least top 3......DAMN!!!....initially i didnt want to blame anyone or what lah....but ya....he started talking to me....making me think so much.....BASKET!!!!.....grrrrr

Sigh~~~.........

Went down to yishun today....tried a few games.....later on....went out ......was kinda fun la....with all the sabotage by TOH AND ROGER.....hahah....should i say a near sabotage....hahahaha....

Bought a note flap today.....at last....managed to find it...heh heh....but but but.....buy already...no money to put inside leh....haha....shitzzz........

AAarrrggghhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!........................sigh~~~~.................nobody one..............hahahahahahahaha..............

Ciaozzz

Back in SG!!!!

2004-12-13T23:35:00.000+08:00

Yup Yup......i'm back home at last.....hahaa.....reached home at about 2 am in the morning on monday.......damn tired!!! Uploaded some photos that was taken during the few days at KL.....the rest i will upload them on my webshots another time.....so ya

Okok....this trip was a pretty enjoyable one i would say......good things and bad things happened.....but ya....i guess its more of good things lah.....so ya

For once.....i was actually able to Qualify for a tournament.....hahaha....cool!!.....though the cut off was kinda low...and its only graded....but still....who cares....i qualify. Oh ya.....i was the last qualifier lah.....and only managed to get my name up on the score board till the second last squad....when the results came out....i was jumping like mad lah....hahaha..... LAter on, lionel's dad suddenly talked to me....he asked whether if i qualified....so i told him yah....but for graded.....then he said it doesnt matter.....hahaha......but 1 things he said made me so motivated or shocked...hahha...was that " you are the only flag barrier " ....i was like....erm....WOW!!!....hahha....but ya.....next day morning was the finals.....managed to catch some sleep.....erm....aarrgrhhhh......i got killed by a pair of lanes manz.....damn pissed lah....then happily in between i bowled a super low series.....sigh~~~.....in the end only managed 12th position.....so ya....think of it....if only i bowled my normal game in that screwed up block.....i would have gotten top 3......sigh~~~....WTH!!!......but ya....nvm lah.....afterall its only my first time there and i at least managed to qualify....so ya......

This year's open division is seriously damn damn damn tough lah.....of all 31 qualifiers.....only the last 2 hit less then 900 ( for 4 games) .....last qualifier hit a 898.....siao right????.....haha.....but ya....many people only managed to whack in on the last few squads ......but at least ace and roger made it on the last day....so ya.....not that bad lah.....oh ya...jamie was also the only singaporean that qualified for the graded division......

hmm......during the trip....managed to see many things.....hahha.....for instance...i've actually witness how a motorist can TRY to rob people along the street......but ya...in the end....a group of people attacked the accomplice and the motorist.....damn!!!....lucky it was raining....so the they kinda fought for a very short period only and was able to get away......its so dangerous there manz.....

Managed to see the international standard now.....i can say that my bowling stands no where at all....hahahha....but ya...nvm....slowly lor......

Hmmm......don't think i really wanna talked about the so called sad thing that had happened there lah.....so ya....i mean...what for right???.....no point mentioning where it doesnt really make a difference at all.

I WANT TO GO ON DIET!!!!........damn fat already.....shitzz k......hahaha.....sigh~~~~.....too fat...means nobody wants.... thats my form of motivation i guess....hahahha

Cant imagine.....for the first time.....im feeling the competition mood for so long....hahaha.....This coming Wednesday is Junior Classic already!!.....and again....im gonna take leave from school....for another 3 days......damn damn....school working is starting to pile up.....without us noticing it.....what a short semester manz....this is crazy....plus we paid so much school fees...hahahha.....actually its considered damn bloody little already lah.....hahaha....but compared to having a 4months plus semester to a 14 weeks semester....its considered alot of difference leh.....

Alrite lah.....guess i aint gona talk much .....still feeling damn tired.....was constantly having headache throughout the journey back to singapore.....
Cant seem to be good enough for anything......sigh~~~.....

OK....Ciaoz Peeps....

2004-12-13T23:33:00.000+08:00

My all time favourite....the Middle Finger Shot....hahaha....

2004-12-13T23:32:00.000+08:00

Sis's Star Shot......4 camera was pointing at her taking mutiple shots....ahhahaha

2004-12-13T23:31:00.000+08:00

Mr Ace Chen!!!!......

2004-12-13T23:30:00.001+08:00

Sis n Toh.......piangzz.....act cute leh....hahaha

2004-12-13T23:30:00.000+08:00

Erm.....whahahaa......no comments.....

2004-12-13T23:29:00.001+08:00

Roger..... Ah Toh.....Me.......

2004-12-13T23:29:00.000+08:00

Haha....my favourite photo taken....